


Take The Long Way Home

by Brokensoul



Category: Once Upon A Time - Fandom
Genre: AU, Almost home, Angst, Arson, Child Abuse, Child Sexual Abuse, Consensual Kink, Dat Ass....Damn, Domestic Violence, Drug Use, Erotic Strangulation, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, I love him, Infidelity, Lots more murder, Mental Instability, More Murder, More angst, Murder, Mystery, Mystery unraveling, Revenge, Sitophilia, Torture, Watching secretly, Whipping, Yet more murder, corpse fucking, dark secrets, marital rape, should let you know this actually has a happy ending
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-09
Updated: 2017-08-05
Packaged: 2018-09-21 21:59:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 23
Words: 37,327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9568628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Brokensoul/pseuds/Brokensoul
Summary: Belle finds herself married to an erratic and sadistic financial genius. She tries her best to please him, but starts to wonder if there is something more out there, maybe even love?Rumple and Gold are two different characters in this story.  Rumple is a modern day character. Rumple is a devious rotten bastard, and Gold is a sweet but strong woobie love.Poor Belle, she is complex and confused, it's a long way home.





	1. The lord giveth and the lord taketh away

"Isobellle," R called out playfully. "Isssobellle!" Though playful, the tone was somehow vaguely unpleasant. It was as if the speakers' amusement somehow came at the expense of the listener. Belle thought, "If a cat were batting around a mouse, if it could speak as it played with it, that would be its voice."

 

Belle, sitting at a large marble topped dressing table, shivered and hurried to put the final touches on her lipstick as her husband, R, swept grandly into the spacious cream and gold room. He had his own room adjacent to hers, and rarely slept in this one, prefering to sleep in his own room after a session of vigorous lovemaking. Now he posed with one foot angled in front of the other, elegant and poised, graceful hands clasped together behind his straight back. He made a lean and tidy figure, magnetic and sinuous. His face was sharp, sinister, as were his eyes. Though his eyes appeared hooded and lazy, they missed nothing. While seemingly relaxed, he yet gave the impression of coiled and dangerous energy, barely contained. He was dressed in an immaculate designer tuxedo, perfectly tailored, with a white silk shirt and black bow tie. He wore a large gold Rolex studded with diamonds. He sported a diamond stick pin at his lapel, diamond cufflinks at his wrists. He smelled of an imtoxicating mixture of exotic spices and deep forest. With a silver silk scarf draped over his straight shoulders he positively oozed privilege and power. 

Though she found him flawless and more than a little breathtaking, Belle secretly thought it was all a little flashy. Though with where she came from, what did she know of such things? She contemplated his angular face, which, though very handsome, was marred on one side by extensive scarring. Maybe his life had pain in the past too? Those scars suggested as much. It appeared as if at one point in his life someone had dragged something dull raggedly through his poor face. She couldn't imagine a situation where anyone could get that much of an upper hand against this relentlessly laughing man, and knew there were countless wild rumors as to the origin of his scars. He was imagined to be everything from a James Bond type spy to a hell born demon. Belle had to admit to herself she wouldn't be surprised by either one, or anything in between. He was just that enigmatic.

Belle looked back anxiously at his reflection in her mirror and felt her heart drop as she saw his nose crinkle and his top lip curl.

 

"You're not really wearing that shade are you? It makes you look like a dock whore waiting to suck off the sailors." He said it lightly, as if he were fondly joking with her, but his eyes were flat. Belle shivered at the warning there, it definitely wouldn't do to anger him this early on in the evening. The waters were liable to get a lot more turbulent before morning arrived.

"Oh, n-n-no, of course not," Belle stammered. She quickly grabbed a tissue from a solid silver tissue box and scrubbed off the offending lipstick.

 

"Here pet, this one," R handed her the nude Chanel lipstick he preferred, tossing the other one carelessly into the wastebasket. Turning without checking if she obeyed him, he swaggered out the door calling back in a giggly tone, "And hurry up, pet, you knoooow what happens if you keep me waiting." Belle hurriedly finished up with the lipstick and hurried over to the bed where the dress R had chosen for her was laid out. Also placed there were a pair of low heeled silver sandals. Generally Belle preferred very high heels, but R said he liked this height better. Belle suspected it was because it pleased him to be able to gaze down upon her. After dressing, Belle walked over to the huge freestanding mirror. She looked without pleasure on her reflection. The bright red dress fit skin tight, the neckline high in the front, the back cut so low it revealed a hint of derrière cleavage. The simple cut and clinging silk showcased her petite but lush curves. The cut of the dress made undergarments impossible, and she knew he had planned it that way. He never overlooked even the tiniest detail. Her long hair, dyed black as R required, to make her blue eyes pop, was swept up into a severe chignon to display the diamond and ruby earrings he had given her last summer. Belle blushed to remember what other pleasures he had gifted her with that night. She swallowed down the memories and checked her reflection. She looked gorgeous and expensive and unattainable, and nothing at all like the Belle she remembered before her life with R. She told herself that was a good thing, yes, a good thing. And it was, of course, but she sometimes felt that Isobel had consumed Belle, and she really wasn't sure how she felt about that. Was it wrong to lose part of your soul, even if that part was irrevocably broken? She didn't know.

Belle hurried down the marble stairs to the large foyer where R waited impatiently near the huge front doors, bouncing lightly on his heels. Tapping one gleaming Gucci shoe, he looked pointedly at his watch, waggling a finger at her. That was one strike, Belle knew. She was determined to make him proud tonight. Looking her over with a supercilious raised eyebrow and a finger against his smirking lips, he tilted his head to the side and laughed, "Well, I suppose you'll do, though you'll never pass for society." 

Belle flushed, she knew it was true. This wasn't her world, but it would be Isobel's world, and Isobel would be worthy of it, and worthy of R. 

R gripped her by the wrist with one strong hand and snaked his other around her waist to settle firmly at the small of her back. 

Propelling her forward, he said ,"Mustn't keep everyone waiting for me!"

He gave her a wicked grin, causing her pulse to race. He swept her out the front entrance and down the expansive front stairs toward a low gleaming limousine. Belle tried not to stumble on the stairs under the forcefulness of R's hand pushing at her back. His mouth wore an amused little smirk, as if he were aware of her struggle. And he probably was, Belle thought, he was ever entertained at even the smallest discomfort of others.

Belle managed to reach the limo without falling. The black clad driver held the door open for her, carefully averting his gaze. She awkwardly climbed in, scooting to the far side and holding the long gown aside with some difficulty. R bounced in, landing easily and gracefully next to her. The driver closed the door behind them and went around to settle behind the wheel. As the large engine rumbled to life and the car pulled away from the house, R stared at Belle intensely without blinking. He often did that, and it never failed to discomfit her.

Belle sat, uncomfortable in the strained silence, aware of his wide eyes staring at her. She turned toward the window, the back of her neck prickling. She pretended to be interested in the passing scenery, though it was too dark to see much. Belle felt a trickle of sweat slide down between her breasts. Sometimes she felt being married to a genius was too much... she felt his gaze boring into her soul, examining all her secrets and dreams and judging how they could best be used for his own agenda. Belle was aware of his desire for cruelty, but she was also very aware of his overwhelming sexual aura. In the close confines of the car it slithered over her skin like a serpent, licked at her secret places with its forked tongue. She gave a start and a small gasp when she felt his fingers dancing over her thigh.

"Penny for your thoughts, precious," R slyly said. Belle felt he already knew exactly what she was thinking, and was secretly laughing at her.

She fixed a pleasant look on her face as she turned to him and answered, " I was thinking how thoughtful you always are, providing me with such beautiful things to wear. I hope I can make you proud tonight and impress your friends and business colleagues."

"Oh, pet, how could you not? Just smile, stay quiet, and be decorative. You are beautiful, you will be perfect." It was an order disguised as a compliment, a fist in a velvet glove, but Belle already knew what was expected of her. She knew, too, what the consequences would be should she fail to live up to expectations. Her breath hitched slightly as his fingers continued to dance delicately up her thigh. She well remembered what those talented fingers could do to her. R let his hand move into the high slit of the tight dress, creeping higher. Belle struggled to keep her composure and not let him see how he was affecting her. 

"You are the perfect woman, Isobel," he trilled. "You are so very, very lovely." R leaned in until his warm breath ghosted against Belle's neck and goosebumps raised on her bare arms. "Do you know what the sight of you in that dress does to me, hmm?" His fingers moved ever nearer to her core and he breathed in her ear, "You make me so hard just looking at you that I want to grip my cock and and pump it till I come all over that gorgeous, tight little body of yours." Belle whimpered slightly as he exhaled hotly against her throat and blew softly in her ear. 

R slowly parted her moistening folds and roughly thrust a finger into her as Belle gasped aloud. He growled against her, "I want to lick you slowly until you are shaking, until you are begging and dripping wet, I want to drink your sweet juices, and then I want to fuck you until you can't stand up, until you are writhing with desire, trembling in an agony of pleasure, unable to speak because your lust has overwhelmed you. " He continued thrusting with his finger while his voice growled and stalked and prowled. Oh God, that voice! How could just a voice be like sex itself? His thumb circled her clit until her toes curled and her muscles began to lock up. Belle felt her insides tighten down low and her hands curled into fists. 

"Oh god..." Belle moaned.

" I want to fuck you deep and hard, fuck you until we are the only two people in the world. I want to fuck you till you are screaming my name." 

His hand was moving faster now, teasing her unmercifully toward the edge. "You're going to scream my name, you're going to beg me for it, and it will feel like nothing you've ever felt before, it will feel like the end of the world, the beginning of heaven, just the two of us, forever and ever." He panted against her throat, nipping and licking. 

"Oh God," Belle gasped, "Please, please." 

Belle felt as if she were losing her mind, it was always this way, so intense as to be painful, he knew exactly how to touch her.She was so damn close, she would scream, go insane, die! 

"Please, oh please," she begged wretchedly. 

" Please, what, Isobel?" 

"Please," she moaned, she didn't want to have to say it, was humiliated to have to say it. 

"Please, what,Isobel," he laughed." Tell me what you need, pet." 

"Please... make me come." Ashamed but desperate. 

He immediately withdrew his hand and gave a wicked chuckle. "Oh, sweetheart, I'm afraid you'll have to wait, we'll be there soon." With that he turned away, looking out the window and smiling a smug and sadistic grin. 

Belle felt her face burn. She felt ashamed and off balance. She also felt frustrated and a little angry. This wasn't the first time he had pulled something like this, and it always left her feeling stupid. She should know better, but he was just so damn attractive. And he knows it too, she thought ruefully, he knows how much I want him. That shamed her too, that she knew better and still couldn't help it. She risked a quick sideways peek at him and saw his satisfied expression, and damn if She didn't want to reach out and touch him, beg him to touch her. It was a sickness, some kind of madness of her heart and body, some depraved attraction to his darkness and cruelty. 

The limo pulled up to the entrance of the hotel and Belle smoothed her skirt and tried to compose herself. She needed to be on her toes and stay sharp tonight. Any slip up on her part, and she would pay for it later. She screwed up her courage, ran her hand through her hair, and took R's hand as she exited the car. 

"Here goes nothing," Belle thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next ... Belle makes a mistake


	2. At the Party

Belle followed R around the large room as he chatted with different glittering and well dressed guests. She smiled and nodded when she was expected to, and stood quietly and looked pretty as she was expected to . Most of the conversations revolved around dull business dealings that she had no interest in. She soon began to feel bored. R noticed, as he missed very little in general, and missed nothing at all when it came to her.

 

R kept a strong grip on her hand as he led her through the crowd and over to a low divan. He eyed her with concern. "You look thirsty, pet. Sit here and I'll go get you a glass of champagne,hmm?" He gave her his trademark sly smile and headed off through the chattering crowd. 

 

Belle watched the people for a while, she didn't really know anyone and had no desire to start up a conversation with a stranger. Her attention was drawn to a platform in one corner of the large space when a three piece ensemble of musicians began to play a soft classical background piece. As she was watching the violinist she noticed off to the side of the stage, R was speaking intently to a tall slim woman in a glittering low cut black gown. The woman was striking looking and seemed to be fascinated by whatever R was telling her. The woman handed R something small, and he slipped it into his jacket pocket. As Belle watched he kissed her on the cheek, laughed, and turned on his heel and strode away.

 

Belle wondered what all that had been about, she thought he was just going to get her a drink. She tried to keep her mind off it by making up stories about the different couples she watched dancing. She wondered if they were all as happy as they appeared to be behind the closed doors of their perfect mansions.

 

R sidled up to her with two cut crystal flutes of bubbling champagne. Handing her one he said, "I hope you didn't fall into despair for lack of my company," and giggled.

 

"No, my love, but I'm glad you're back. Would you please sit with me a minute?"

 

"Of course, precious. Anything you wish," and he landed lightly on the seat next to her, setting her glass down and grasping both of her hands in his. His energy was manic, and his eyes huge."I see how everyone here has noticed how lovely you are." He leaned in to nuzzle lightly at her neck, and Belle tried not to moan. After what he did to her I the limo, the lightest touch from him was enough to get her going. He lifted one hand behind her neck and started to draw her in for a kiss.

 

"Well, well, dear R, who have we here?" A cultured and amused voice interrupted them.

 

Belle looked up, annoyed, to see the very woman who had been speaking to her husband across the room. She was even more stunning up close, with long red nails, perfect makeup, and eye catching white and silver hair. She was exactly the upper society type that made Belle feel like an uneducated nobody.

 

"Why, Cruella, how wonderful to see you," R crowed, as if he hadn't just been chatting with her five minutes ago. "This is my wonderful and charming wife, Isobel. Isobel, this is Cruella, a long standing business associate."

 

Belle nodded, but before she could speak, Cruella chortled and declared, "Oh R, she's just a darling little thing! Good to see you keep yourself occupied with something other than your deals! " The vile woman gave a knowing and dirty laugh as she gazed at Belle with a grin and a raised eyebrow. "Can't be all work and no play, you'd become such a dull boy!" Somehow she'd succeeded , with just a few words, in making Belle feel like nothing more than a sex toy for a successful man.

"Now, Cruella, you know I'd never let such a tradgedy occur! What would society come to?" R shuddered theatrically and they both laughed.

 

"Well do bring her by the estate sometime, darling. I'm sure it would be... entertaining." With that the awful woman blew them a kiss and stalked off toward the bar.

 

"Oh!" Belle exclaimed, " what an absolutely horrid woman!" She was shaking with indignation.

 

R giggled, "Now, pet, you must learn to hold your own with the likes of her. There are plenty more like her in town you'll have to deal with. " He leaned in to nip at her throat, sniffing loudly.

 

Belle felt her face turn red with anger , but Rs hand was suddenly circling her wrist too tightly as she heard him mutter, "Oh shit, not him."

 

Belle glanced up to see who R was talking about and saw a tall dark haired man approaching them. 

"R!" The man shouted in a hearty voice, "didn't expect to see your raggedy old ass here! What brings you to party with us peasants, mate?"

The man had the bluest eyes Belle had ever seen,and she felt them traveling all over her as R stood up, pulling her with him.

 

"Killian," R trilled, as if delighted to see him "how have you been? Just catching up with old friends. May I introduce you to my wife, Isobel?"

 

"You certainly may, " the dark haired man laughed, "Pleasure, mam," he purred and lifted Belle's hand to his lips.

 

Belle felt her small wrist bones grind together as Rs grip on her other side become increasingly tight. He did not like this man, and he did not like this man touching his wife.

 

"Well you are certainly a lucky old bastard, but I really came over to make sure you received my reply to your inquiry on my company," the man named Killian said.

 

"Yes, yes, yes, you are not willing to sell at this time, " R replied airily, as if he could care less.

 

"At this time or any other mate," Killian laughed, "you can count on that." He winked at Belle, turned around, still laughing , and swaggered off.

 

"We'll see about that, " R muttered under his breath. He turned and smiled brilliantly at Belle, and said brightly, "Shall we dance, my dear?"

 

Belle let herself be led out onto the dance floor, and though both of them smiled and laughed, and R was charming to everyone, only she could tell that he was seething underneath. Her hands perspired with nervousness, and she noticed he was drinking a good bit of champagne as the evening wore on, though his large eyes remained alert and glittering.

 

"Darling," R said, "will you excuse me, my pet? I must visit the facilities. I'll be right back,love," and he escorted her back to the divan they had rested on earlier, after making sure to provide her with a fresh glass of wine. Belle watched him slip into the crowd, and could not help but think what a very handsome man he was. It was true he had a temper, and a cruel streak, but he could be so thoughtful, and there was no doubt he loved her.

 

She sat and sipped her wine and began to relax. Because her gown was so long she was able to slip off her sandals and stretch her aching toes. She gave a sigh of relief.

 

"Looks like someone's ready for this party to be over" Bell glanced up and saw it was the dark haired man, Killian, that R had introduced her to before.

 

"Oh, Mr. Killian, you startled me!"

 

"It's just Killian, no Mr., love. Afraid I'm just a working peasant. New money, you know," he whispered the last humourosly. "Mind if I sit?" And he plopped down on the divan without waiting.

Belle laughed nervously, she wasn't really used to these parties yet, and wasn't sure what kind of conversation was expected of her. She lifted her glass to her lips to try to stall while she thought of something witty to say. Her hand was trembling and she dribbled a little wine on the front of her dress, " I'm so clumsy, " she laughed.

 

"Don't worry about it, here," Killian had a large linen napkin and tried to dab the spot.

 

Belle grabbed his hand to stop him and said hurriedly" I'll get it, please," She tried to take the cloth from him and they both ended up laughing. At that moment Belle up to see R across the room, staring at them with fury on his face and with hell in his eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Belle in trouble next


	3. Fury

Belle was nervous in the car all the way home. R didn't say anything, just sat smiling, the only outward sign of his agitation the way his hands writhed restlessly over one another, as if he couldn't control them.

After they entered the mansion, R grabbed her by the wrist roughly and leaned down into her face, grinning."Go to your room,pet. NOW."

 

Belle rushed to her room and sat heavily on her bed. Her breath was coming in shallow pants and she realized she was terrified. She'd rarely seen R so angry and didn't know what to expect or when to expect it. The minutes seemed to drag by like hours as she sat there in dread awaiting she knew not what. Eventually she heard classical piano thundering through the house and knew R was seated at the grand piano, trying to exorcise his demons through music.

Belle could hear his anguish through the music he played, the way he hammered at the keys. The notes rose crashing and singing through the ceiling, carrying his pain and sorrow and rage to her.

She hadn't meant to upset him. She didn't know what his history was with the dark haired man, and in fact didn't know much about his history at all. Though they were married, she sometimes felt he was a stranger to her. He never spoke of his past, but she had the feeling there was some tragedy hidden there, something too awful for him to remember.

 

She heard a discordant mash of many keys, and imagined him collapsing over the keyboard , overwhelmed by some deep misery she could not fathom. She sobbed quietly to herself, sorrow for him and fear for herself mixing in a maelstrom of strange emotion. She wished there were something she could do to fix things. Eventually her sobs turned to exhaustion and she lay down on the pillows, wrung out.

 

Sometime later the door to her room opened and closed softly. Belle looked up warily to see R standing there, slumped, his back to her. His forehead rested against the door and he clutched a half empty tumbler of scotch in one hand.

He suddenly turned to face her and she was shocked by the utter desolation on his face. He looked so very lost, so destroyed, his large eyes full of tears. Belle's heart was breaking, and she cried out,"I'm sorry! I don't know what I did to upset you, that man just came over and sat down, I didn't-" her voice was cut off as R moved lightning fast to her and gripped her throat painfully in his strong hand.

Belle tried to protest but began to panic as she could get no air. Rs eyes were wild and she felt he was looking right through her, not seeing her at all. He flung the scotch glass with his other hand and it shattered against the wall.

 

"Please," was all Belle could manage, trembling, but she could see he was gone, he did not hear her. He kept one hand around her throat and with the other ripped away the red gown as if it was made of paper.

 

Belle gasped in air greedily when his hand left her throat, but then it gripped both her hands above her head and forced her down on the bed. "Stay there!" R growled. He began to pace around the room like an enraged panther, his hands fluttering wildly. Belle was too frightened to do anything but lay where she was, in the torn rags of her dress. 

He seemed to be waging some internal debate as he stalked back and forth, emotions chasing one another over his distraught face. She didn't know if he was trying to calm himself, or was simply getting more worked up. She wanted to reach out to him and called softly, "Sweetheart."

 

That was a mistake. His head whipped around and his eyes focused on her like a predator glimpsing something weak and tasty. He prowled over to her slowly and stared, then he slowly began to grin. "Bad girl," he purred darkly. He did not sound like himself, his smile was dangerous and wicked. "No respect."

 

Belle watched in trepidation as he began to slowly unbuckle his belt, his gleaming wild eyes never leaving hers. She could feel the manic energy boiling off him. She shivered. 

R removed his leather belt and folded it in half, holding it by the ends so it was doubled. He began to smack the belt into the palm of his hand, his tongue darting out to wet his bottom lip. "Turn over, dearie."

 

Belle was gobsmacked. Did he really mean to do what she thought he meant to do? This couldn't be real!

 

"I said turn over! Now!" He was still grinning that awful maniacal grin.

Belle reluctantly turned over on her stomach, exposing her naked rear end. She was shaking in fear and confusion. He had always been volatile, but this was weird. She gripped the sheets in hands and gritted her teeth. 

She heard the belt whistle through the air and then it landed, crack! on her ass. She screeched in pain and shock! Oh, that hurt! Crack! Down it came again, hard as before. She cried out as each blow landed over and over. It began to burn so much, she couldn't stand it. She writhed and cried and tried to crawl away but he followed her, whipping mercilessly. She turned around, tears streaming down her face, and held up her hands to try to ward off the blows.

 

It did no good, he simply kept striking her, her arms, legs, anywhere he could reach. He was grinning the whole time. Finally, as her skin broke and began to trickle blood, he seemed to tire.

 

Belle sat, sobbing in terror and humiliation. R stood over her, panting heavily and grinning. At that moment he was an evil stranger to her. She backed up to the headboard, as far away from this vile sight as she could get. R raised an eyebrow and palmed himself through his trousers. Belle noticed with horror that he was hard.

 

R lowered his hand to his zipper, pulling it down as he stared at his bloody weeping wife, pathetically clutching her rags to herself. He pulled out his swollen cock and groaned as he gave it two firm pumps. He licked his lips as he approached the bed.

Belle couldn't back away any farther. She didn't know what to do, her own husband was unrecognizable to her. She was in pain. 

R reached out with both hands and gripped her tightly by the hips, dragging her down the bed. Belle batted at him ineffectually, but he didn't even notice. He forced his knee in between her legs and roughly spread her out. Without any sort of lead up he grabbed his cock and shoved himself inside her to the hilt. R shuddered and groaned , laying still on top of her a moment and smothering her under his weight. Belle felt him pull almost all the way out and then he slammed back into her. She just lay in a sort of shock as he slammed into her aching body over and ever, grunting with every savage thrust. His hand reached up and grasped her hand so hard that she could feel the ring she wore deforming, the bent shape cutting into her hand. Then his hand moved over to her breasts, kneading too roughly, as his other hand pinned her hip with enough force to bruise. 

He thrust into her forcefully, seeming to go on forever as he bit her savagely all over her neck and breasts, rutting into her, moaning and dripping his sweat over her. She turned her face to the side, bit her lip, and silently wept. 

"Bad girl, no respect," R muttered under his breath, as his thrusts became even deeper and more erratic. Finally he let out a grunt and a deep groan and released his hot come inside her , shuddering all over and gripping her by the throat as he came. 

They lay in silence for a moment, Belle too afraid and ashamed to make a sound. R suddenly stood up, zipped himself up, and strode out of her room. She heard him lock the door from the outside and then his quick steps receded down the hall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A broken soul next  
> Please leave comments and questions


	4. A Broken Soul

Belle groaned as she sat up carefully in her bed. She ached all over. She examined her naked body and saw that she was covered in bruises and welts from the whipping she suffered. She stumbled to the bathroom and groaned as she looked in the mirror, her chest and neck were bruised as well. She winced from the pain in her finger as she tried to remove her bent ring from the swollen digit and gave up.

 

She carefully brushed her teeth and washed her face as best she could. Grabbing a silk robe from the nearby hook, she returned to her bed to await the arrival of R to unlock her door.

 

She hoped his black mood was over.

 

She soon heard a tentative knock at her door, and called out shakily,"I'm awake," and heard the door unlock. R pushed in a cart loaded down with breakfast foods, tea service, and fresh flowers.

 

"I thought you might like breakfast in bed," he said timidly. He kept his eyes on the floor as he busied himself with the cart, "I made all your favorites." He brought over a vase of flowers and set it on her nightstand. " I picked these for you in the garden this morning."

 

She could see the ashamed look on his face, but said nothing. He wrung his hands a few times and hung his head.

 

He didn't seem to know what else to say and just prepared a tray for her. He brought the tray and set it on the bed next to her, finally working up the courage to look at her face.

 

"Oh God, Belle, I'm so sorry, truly I am!" He sank down on his knees by her bed, burying his face in the covers in his shame. "I don't know what came over me! I don't deserve you, I know I don't!" He wept bitterly.

Belle was taken aback. She was appalled by what he had done, but she still hated to see him fall apart like this. He continued to sob brokenly,"I had too much to drink, I know that's no excuse, I'm a monster, I'm so so sorry, my love!" His hands were trembling and his heaving sobs shook his small frame violently.

 

"My whole life all I've ever wanted was someone to care for me, and now I've ruined it! How could you ever forgive me? No one could ever love me! You don't understand - what I've been through, my life, I am truly a broken soul. You were my only chance at redemption!"

 

Belle could not help but be touched, in spite of herself. To see this powerful man, kneeling and weeping, begging for love and another chance. And he had saved her, she could never forget that.

"Belle, please! Please forgive me and I'll do anything! Please, I can't - I can't live without you," R confessed miserably. "I can't" he whispered.

 

Belle reached out her hand and ran it through his soft hair. "You really hurt me," she said, "and I don't just mean physically."

 

"I know, Belle, I know. I've called Dr. Whale, he's coming to look you over soon. I promise I'm going to take good care of you! I will make this up to you, I promise, and it will never ever happen again," R looked up at her, his large tearful eyes filled with hope.

Not long after that R escorted Dr. Whale to her room. He was R's personal doctor of many years, and could be relied on to be discreet. He examined Belle carefully while R hovered nearby, his hands fluttering nervously, rocking back and forth on his heels.

 

"R," Dr. Whale said, "could you bring me a wet washcloth please?"

 

"Of course, of course," R nodded eagerly, his eyes huge. He rushed out of the room, anxious to help.

 

Once R was gone Dr. Whale turned to Belle, "you're going to be fine, dear, but if I could offer you a piece of advice? I've known your husband a very long time, and...well let's just say that some things are broken beyond repair. Some things have jagged edges that will only cut you if you try to put them back together." He patted her hand.

 

Before Belle could ask him what he meant, R returned with the cloth.

 

Dr. Whale instructed him, "Gently clean any cuts, and the apply this salve. There are no broken bones, and she should be just fine after some rest." He handed the salve to R, said goodbye to Belle, and made his way out.

R helped Belle to sit up, fussing with the pillows to make sure she was comfortable. He spoke to her eagerly about books she liked as she ate her breakfast. When she was done he put the tray aside and gently removed her robe. He carefully cleaned the cuts on her skin, looking at her with wide sad puppy eyes as he did so. Afterward he lovingly applied the salve to every scrape and bruise. 

 

Even though he was the one who had caused the pain, Belle wanted comfort and R was the only one she had to give it. So slowly she found herself twining her fingers in his hair and leaning her head against his chest. He eased her back down into the soft pillows and ran his hands lovingly up and down her arms, kissing her throat gently, and Belle sighed in gratitude. She was tired, and as she fell asleep, she promised herself she would have a talk with him after she rested.

 

When Belle awoke later, she was feeling much better. She could tell by the slant of the sun through the window that it was late afternoon. Padding over to her bedroom door, she tried the knob, and sighed in frustration as she found it locked. She was really going to have a serious talk with R.

 

Right then the door swung open and R appeared with another tray of food."How are you feeling, my pet? I didn't want to wake you earlier , so I brought you a late lunch."

He set the tray near her and looked to her eyes for approval, so hopeful.

 

Belle felt that now, while he was so eager to please, would be the time to make her request. "R , must you lock the door? Don't you trust me?" She began.

 

"Of course I do, sweetheart, of course! I just had to go out and I wanted to make sure you didn't wander around and get hurt. What can I do to show you I love you and trust you?" R asked eagerly.

 

This was it. Belle took a deep breath. "I've been here a long time, and I've never left this house on my own. I would like to take a weekend trip, just by myself, to the country. I want to relax, get away from the city, and reconnect with myself. I love you so much, but sometimes I feel like I'm losing myself." She didn't even have her own name anymore, as he insisted on calling her by the more elegant "Isobel" rather than Belle. His presence could be so all consuming, she desperately needed to be just Belle for a few days. She held her breath as she waited for him to answer.

 

R looked stricken, as if she had asked for a divorce rather than a couple days to herself. She could see he wanted to forbid it, but was afraid to after his horrible behavior the night before. His fear and distress were written clearly on his face, and he wrung his hands pitifully, but after a few long seconds, he reluctantly nodded.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next Storybrooke


	5. Storybrooke

Belle was excited about her trip. She planned to leave as soon as possible, before R had a chance to change his mind. She had booked a room in a quaint little town in the country and was looking forward to relaxing and catching up on her reading.

 

Her door opened and R entered quietly. He hovered there miserably as Belle tossed a few books into her bag. She wished he wouldn't just stand there, it was making her feel guilty, and she didn't like the feeling.

 

"Do you need any help with anything,pet?" R asked, trying and failing for one of his trademark grins. He shuffled nervously, his fingers and thumb sliding across each other.

"No thank you, I don't need much, I won't be gone long," Belle felt an urge to comfort him and walked over to throw her arms around him. "Thank you for this."

"It's nothing," he said, too easily. R slid his arms around her waist and pulled her in close to press against his body.

Belle sighed at the feel of him and then felt a frisson of excitement as he nibbled and licked her neck. "Oh, god, Isobel, I'm sorry, I just can't resist you," R worked his magic, and as usual Belle put off whatever she was thinking to surrender to their passion. 

A few hours later Belle stood outside next to a low slung sports car. It was all packed and there was nothing left to do but go. She had tears in her eyes as she kissed R goodbye, a long lingering burning kiss. 

"I'll miss you," R said, "be good." He couldn't help but color his instruction with some menace. "Please, Isobel, I know I'm not much, but I love you with all my soul." "I'll be back soon, love, I promise!" Belle kissed him deeply and slid behind the wheel of the car he had provided for her. As she pulled away, her heart was broken at the sight of R dropping to his knees, head in his hands.

After what seemed an eternity,R rose from his bleeding knees and entered his mansion. It felt cold and echoing. He quickly grabbed a phone and punched in a number. " Yes, Dove, she took the black Mercedes." R listened. His face changed as he smiled,then giggled. "Yes of course , follow her,and if anyone bothers her,or lays a hand on her," he giggles," Kill them"

Belle sung along to the radio. Feeling both free and guilty. She shook off the guilt, determined to enjoy her vacation, as a highway sign loomed ahead.

 

WELCOME TO STOREYBROOKE

Here it is she thought, though why crossing this line should feel important she didn't know. 

 

Belle soon found herself checking into a very quaint inn run by a slightly crabby elderly woman. After signing in and finding her room she found herself exhausted, and sprawled out on the homely quilt that covered her bed.

 

Her phone rang. "How are you, my darling? Miss me yet?" R's voice trilled. Though yes, she did already miss him, Belle needed to be independent on this short trip.

"Sweetheart I just got here!" She laughed. She did love him making sure she was ok. "I do miss you, always."

After a short conversation Belle felt more secure and ready to explore the little hamlet.

Belle had spent the afternoon in a happy haze, feeling freer than she had felt in along time. The little library had been an unexpected treat, and she spent a few lazy hours there, but now she was hungry. Belle thought she would head over to the diner for a quick lunch, and then maybe take a nap before going out again. She was digging through her bag for her phone without looking where she was going, when she ran smack into someone.

"Oh my, I'm so sorry! I'm afraid I almost knocked you down!" Exclaimed the stranger. Belle looked up to see a handsome but flamboyant man. He flapped his hands at her,"can't be knocking over the local wildlife, can I? So few nice animals to look at in this town!"

 

Belle couldn't help but laugh. The man was good looking, but she didn't feel awkward. His mannerisms and aura just screamed "gay." She felt quite unafraid. "That's alright. I'm in no hurry, just exploring your adorable town. I was about to go to lunch"

 

The man bowed," As was I, dear lady! Jefferson, at your service!"

 

Belle giggled and swept an old fashioned curtsey. "And I am Belle, lovely sir. Perhaps you would care to join me for lunch?"

 

"I could think of nothing finer, dear lady! Unfortunately, I must run a quick errand first, but if I may make a suggestion, there is a very interesting antiques and curio shop on the way to the diner. Perhaps you might stop in there to make up the time I must be away, and then meet with me for luncheon?" He cocked an eyebrow comically.

Belle was charmed. "That sounds like a wonderful diversion, good sir. I shall look forward to your company." She giggled as Jefferson waggled his fingers in a goodbye and sashayed away. With a light heart Belle set off down the sidewalk toward the antique shop.

Belle was still giggling to herself when she saw the sign, Gold's Pawn Shop And Antiquities. She didn't feel there could be much of interest in a shop like that in such a small town, but she had some time to kill, so she entered anyway. A little bell above the door jingled merrily as she entered. 

 

Standing I'm the doorway, Belle looked about in fascination. the shop was positively crammed with obscure objects. The proprietor was nowhere in sight. She turned back around and looked at the street. 

 

"May I help you with something?" A bored but cultured voice enquired.

Belle turned around and almost screamed when she saw who was speaking.All the blood drained from her face as she stared at the man who appeared to be a clone of her own husband.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A mystery to be solved , R's backstory, danger, and smut all to come in the next chapters.


	6. Snowstorm

R sat at the piano, his long elegant fingers teasing out beautiful music. He played his soul, painful, dark, beautiful.The music climbed and clawed ,singing pain and longing to the rafters; disappearing, unwanted,unnoticed. 

"Why do you let her do this to you? I've never known you to be so weak," Cruella stood up and walked over to the grand piano," I don't understand why you don't simply make things the way you want them. Teach the little bitch a lesson in gratitude." She pulled a packet out of her pocket, and opening it carefully tapped out a measure of white powder on top of the piano.

 

R stood up,"I don't know," he looked miserable and defeated,"I dont know fucking anything anymore," He took a slim knife from his pocket and began to carefully chop and sort the powder. His handsome face fell. "Have you ever felt you were just sick of your own shit?"

 

"Can't say I have," Cruella laughed. After taking a large swallow of gin from her crystal tumbler, she rolled a hundred dollar bill into a tube and approached the piano."I promise you. This will help you forget your troubles! It's excellent blow!"She inserted the tube into a nostril and snorted up a line of the cocaine R had mapped out. Sniffing and grinning, Cruella smiled,"your turn, sweet cakes!"

R stood up and took the paper tube she offered. He expertly snorted up the three lines, then straightened, his eyes large and glittering. "Dove says she's behaved perfectly. Her only contact has been with a flaming queen."He bared his sharp teeth at her and laughed lasciviously. 

 

" Then, darling, quit worrying and enjoy yourself, " Cruella stood up and looked R in the eye while she unbuttoned her silk blouse. " We do have tonight." She bared her flimsy scarlet bra and smiled invitingly. Looking him straight in the eye she dipped a long finger into her gin and traced it around an erect lace clad nipple. 

R downed his scotch and strode over to rip off Cruellas blouse.Giggling, he tore it off and threw it to the floor. R eyed her slim body appreciatively, already thinking how he longed to hurt it in ways that he would never allow himself to do with Belle. This little cheating was for her own good, was done to spare her. 

 

"Atta boy!" Cruella encouraged. She grabbed R in a smothering kiss, their tongues entangling. He lashed out and kicked her long legs out from under her and landed on top. He was immediately hard with the violence of it and slapped her brutally across the face, then slapped her again. She could feel his hard on grinding into her stomach. And it made her crazy with desire. R leaned down and cruelly bit her neck. His sharp little teeth tore at the tender flesh. 

"Yes," Cruella moaned , "Please.Oh God.please." 

"Definitely not God, dearie, you might try the other direction," R laughed. He bit her hard, tasting blood and reveling in the delicious coppery mouthful. 

 

Suddenly R stood up, eliciting a moan of need from Cruella."Are you ready to play?" R asked, then stalked over to the piano to sniff up two more lines of coke. He laughed snidely and undid his tie. Cruellas eyes widened with desire as he undid his belt. Her eyes lowered to the sizeable bulge in his trousers. Coke always did have that wonderful effect on him. It also made him vicious as hell, but as far as Cruella was concerned, that was just a side benefit. 

He pulled out a large heavy ottoman and situated it in the middle of the room. He walked over to the shelf and grabbed a candle, grinning. Making sure she watched, he placed it on the stool with a flourish, ever the showman. Bending her over the stool he nipped her roughly on the neck. "Now, I will fuck you, I will fuck you hard," he panted in her ear as he bound her hands to the legs of the ottoman with his tie and belt." He then lit the candle under her stomach," I'm going to fuck you until you want to pass out, but if you relax for even a moment you're going to get burned, you're going to scar your pretty skin. And I'm going to fucking love that."

R put a hand around her throat, squeezing hard while he unzipped his trousers with the other hand. He withdrew his hard cock and forced it into Cruellas mouth, hand tightening on her throat the entire time. He fucked her mouth and choked her at the same time. He let up the choking occasionally to viciously slap her face.He grunted as he slammed into her. He'd planned to fuck her, but her mouth felt so good. What he wanted to, and couldn't do, to Belle, he did to this bitch with a nasty joy.R groaned with unconstrained pleasure, seeing in his mind all manner of sick torture. "It's not my fucking fault! I didn't ask to be made like this!" With every thrust and groan he repeated in his overwrought brain,"Not my fucking fault," thrust and grunt, "Not my fucking fault!" The anger just made him more violent. 

Cruella writhed beneath him in ecstasy. She slid one hand down below to tease herself."Pretend I'm her, pretend I'm her and I'm cheating on you," she panted,She could feel the flame burning her, and it only made her more excited. R slapped her again and she moaned in delirious lust as she spit blood from her mouth. 

 

Just the thought of his love with another man drove R to a frenzy.

R shoved his cock to the back of her throat till she couldn't breathe. His balls slapped her face . His hands tightened around her throat, as he grunted and strained. Cruella couldn't breathe, her sight grew dim,and she passed out in ecstasy. R didn't care , he kept fucking her dead looking face, thrusting in anger, tears running down his face. He thrust into her mouth viciously, and grabbed her by her white hair, he began slamming her head into the floor , causing his member to fall out of her mouth.

"Bitch!" He shouted, "why did you..." he slammed her head again. He knew this wasn't the woman who had hurt him,but his temper could not be contained. He leapt to his feet and began kicking the elegant passed out woman on the floor. "You stupid cunt!" He kicked her with all his strength in the head. He kicked her in the mouth and was gratified to see blood pouring out onto the floor. He laughed and grabbed her by the hair, "Fucking whore! He was my son too, you bitch, you fucking whore!" This wasn't the same woman, but she was a good enough replacement. He grabbed her by the hair again, slamming her head repeatedly into the floor and laughing madly,"my son, too, you fucking bitch!" 

"Enough!" he shouted at himself. He stalked over to the piano and sniffed up more of the coke then poured himself a genorous drink. Throwing himself into an armchair he muttered ,"enough".

 

After a while, he stared at the unconscious woman on his floor. "Well, what the fuck," he unzipped his trousers and knelt down to take advantage of what awaited there.

 

Guess he fucked her after all. Took his time, too.

Standing up,not bothering to zip back up,giggling again in mad satisfaction and his hands twitching out of control, R kicked the now cold woman again for good measure. Striding over to the piano, he finished off the excellent cocaine.

 


	7. Gold Dust

Belle stood there with her mouth hanging open. Her shock had her immobilized. How in the hell was this possible? She'd heard that everyone had a twin somewhere, but this was simply not possible. 

 

The handsome gentleman looked at her like she was unbalanced ( which she was at the moment!) "Do you mind shutting the door, dear, I'm not trying to air-condition the street." His mouth quirked up in a crooked smirk and his cognac eyes twinkled. 

Belle shut her mouth with a snap,"Of course,I'm sorry." She still hovered in the doorway, unsure and trembling. The shop appeared crowded with all manner of old objects, and dust motes danced in the golden sunbeams slanting through the plate glass window front. 

"Well, do come in, dearie. I won't bite, whatever the misguided townsfolk might say." The elegant man fussed with some piece of clockwork, blew on it, looked up and smiled. Oh my God, those same brown eyes, but without the malice. Without the calculation, so much the same and yet so very, very, different. 

 

Belles heart melted at that smile. It was so familiar, and yet so strange. It lacked the teasing impishness of Rs smile and yet was so incredibly like his..How could this be?How the hell could it be? She forced herself to pull herself together and act somewhat normal. 

"Umm, I wondered if you might have any first edition books," Belle stuttered. It's unbelievable! She thought, how, just how.

"Of course, young lady. I am Mr. Gold, proprietor of this dusty establishment." Gold came out from behind the counter. He was dressed in a sharp black suit, unusual in a small village, but he looked very good in it she couldn't help but notice. His guiding hand at her back felt too warm as he showed her to the bookshelf. "I have several rare copies here." His breath was hot on her neck. "Is there anything in particular you were wanting?"

Oh my god, was he doing that on purpose? It was like R was right here with her. Belles knees felt weak. She had no idea what was happening.

Mr. Gold said, "this book in particular is a very well preserved first edition," his hand was so THERE on her waist, "of course its very expensive. " 

Belle's head was spinning and she stepped away from him as he handed her the book. She felt a need to put a little room between herself and the elegant man. He was doing nothing to make her uncomfortable, but the room felt too small with him in it. It was the same with R, but this lacked the menace of that feeling, it wasn't oppressive like Rs prescence could be, but it was overwhelming nonetheless. 

"Oh, its w-wonderful!" Belle stammered, thumbing through it carefully. Her eyes grew wide as she studied the rare book, and she soon forgot anything else. 

Mr. Gold studied her as she lost herself in the book. It was gratifying to see that someone besides himself appreciated such things. She certainly was a tiny little thing. Beautiful hair,too, though the dark color made her too pale. He noticed her full red lips. He shook his head to clear away the stray thoughts, they were unlike him. "My dear, I have a stool near the counter if you would care to sit and study that before you decide on a purchase."

Belle looked up, startled, to see him smiling gently, "Thank you, that's so kind, but I couldn't afford something like this." R probably wouldn't mind if she bought the book, but for some reason Belle didn't think it was a good idea.She handed the book back to him with a sunny smile. As he took the book his hand brushed hers, and an electric shock jolted through her. It was so unexpected, she jumped a little. To hide her confusion she turned to a nearby shelf covered in small curios. There were many tiny porcelain statues, all kinds of little animals, small cottages, and itty bitty people. She exclaimed when she noticed a tiny perfect rose, painted to look marvelously realistic. 

"That's amazing!" She held it up and turned it about, staring." It looks so real, so delicate," her blue eyes were wide with delight. 

"Ah yes, that has been in the shop for a very long time," Mr. Gold looked at her, considering. "I think it should go to someone who will care for it." He gently took the tiny flower from her hand and moved over to his counter. Walking around behind the counter he took out some tissue paper and began wrapping it. "No charge of course. Here," he held it out toward her shyly, "if you'll have it." 

"Oh mr. Gold, you don't have to do that! But it is very sweet." Belle walked over to the counter. "I'll definitely take good care of it." 

"It's no matter at all, my dear. We must welcome newcomers to our little town." He handed her the small package. "After all, we want you to return, Ms...?" 

"You can call me Belle." Belle wondered why she hadn't said Isobel, but then again, that name had never really felt like hers. It was nice to feel ... well, independent. "Thank you again Mr. Gold, but I should be going, I'm meeting a friend for lunch at Granny's." 

"Excellent establishment. I recommend the cheeseburgers and ice tea. Please enjoy your stay here," Gold held out a hand, and smiled shyly. 

Belle took his hand and once again felt that shock. It's just because he looks like R. she told herself. "I'll take your advice," she laughed and headed out the door, turning to wave. 

As the bell over the door jingled again, Gold stared down at his hand for a moment, then shook his head again and smiled.

******************************************************************** 

Outside the shop, Belle stopped to catch her breath. What an extraordinary day! She couldn't quite believe it still, and thought she would definitely be investigating this mystery further. For a moment she reached in her pocket and touched the small packet there. 

Crossing the street, she hurried down to Granny's to meet her new friend, her head whirling with thoughts of the charming antiques dealer. Maybe Jefferson would be able to tell her more about the man. It was only his uncanny resemblance to R that made him so fascinating , she thought. Still, there was something so gentle and shy about him, and maybe even lonely. 

Preoccupied with her confusing thoughts, Belle entered Granny's without noticing the large man who stood near a post office box, watching her carefully. He took out a cell and punched in a number by memory. 

Belle entered the bright cheerful diner and immediately spotted the flamboyant Jefferson waiting for her.

"Ah, darling!" cried Jefferson, "come here and sit." He looked genuinely happy to see her. "Did your afternoon go well?"

"Yes, " Belle sat down, "I visited the shop you mentioned, an interesting place."

 

Jefferson laughed , " I take it you met our town monster, then? Did he try to bite your pretty little head off?"

"Not at all, he was very charming and sweet. Why do you call him monster?" Belle was surprised.

 

Jefferson laughed again, Belle got the feeling he laughed quite a lot. "Pay no attention to that, the narrow minded people of this town must like to gossip. He's the landlord of most property around here, and collecting rent doesn't exactly make a person popular. He's nice enough, just quiet and serious and keeps to himself. I think he needs to stop being so alone. I guess that's easier said than done with some people. With his reputation people avoid him. He's been by himself for as long as I can remember, no friends, no family. Quite the solitary gentleman." 

 

"Oh," Belle frowned," the poor man."

 

"Enough of sad talk!" Jefferson exclaimed. "Let's get some food and talk about you. I want to know absolutely everything!"

 

They spent a happy afternoon eating and talking and laughing, but the soft touch of the lonely pawnbroker was never far from Belles thoughts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well damn, Gold is smooth without meaning to be. Belle is learning a little about herself.  
> Next we'll see what R is up to.and hopefully learn a little of his background. There's a lot to go.


	8. Back Then We Were Happy

R was back from a meeting that had not gone well, and he was in a foul mood. He ripped off his Prada jacket and flung it on the floor in a fury. Fuck! He wanted that air taxi company, but that damned shitpile Killian wouldn't sell. Vindictively he imagined smashing Killian's face in with a heavy object. The image caused a sadistic little smile. Well, he would have what he wanted, one way or another. He always got his own way eventually, always. Ruining Killian could be a bonus in aquiring the company. He was thoughtful as he poured himself some scotch. Yes. Perhaps there was a way to ruin the man and take his company from him at the same time. He took a long drink of the scotch and gave a particularly poisonous grin. He was about to turn on the sound system when his cell beeped. 

R opened the phone,"Yes? Has she spoken to anyone else? Good. Yes, yes, listen. I have a little job here I need you for." R listened a minute. "Then bug her room, dearie," he said nastily. "This can't wait. Yes, her phone and car are already taken care of. Good. Yes." He closed the phone and sighed, he hated to leave her unwatched, but there was no other choice at the moment. It seemed safe enough, but it wasn't good to take chances. Still, it wasn't as if there wasn't any surveillance on her, if she moved the car or had anyone in her room he would know immediately. And of course, R recorded all her phone calls. He'd feel a hell of a lot more relaxed when she was back in her room, though. It wasn't safe out there for her, she needed to be here, where he could watch her, lock her up, keep her safe. She needed him to. His hands opened and closed convulsively at his sides. 

He had a couple more calls to make, a couple of favors to call in, and his plan would be set in motion. It might take a while, but he knew he would get that company, and ruin Killian's reputation in the process. After what that underhanded scum had done to R, he deserved much worse. But this was a good beginning. Only a beginning, the punishment must be painful, severe, and drawn out. Satisfying. 

After his business on the phone was successfully concluded, R relaxed a bit. He turned on the classical music he preferred and settled into his armchair with a large glass of scotch. Imagining the look on Killian's face when he discovered that he'd been beaten, R giggled dementedly.

He went carefully through his plans in head, checking off lists, searching for weak spots until he was satisfied. He would leave nothing to chance. He knew to be always several steps ahead of anyone else. He meticulously planned for anything that might arise to disrupt his plot, and then devised plans for those eventualities as well. His Machiavellian mind worked tirelessly, picking apart each thread and weaving them back together seamlessly. Eventually the scheme was complete, and his head began to droop as the drinks at last combined to drain the manic energy from him. The glass dropped from his hand, and he dozed. 

~~~R looked down with love at Isobels beautiful face. "Don't go yet, love, it's only 9 o'clock." 

"I have to sweetheart. "She glanced at him with regret. "You know I'm interviewing Mr. Jones today, and the paper won't allow me to miss a deadline. I wish I could stay my love, more than anything." And R knew she meant it, he could see the devotion shining in her eyes, a mirror to his own deep love for her."But I'll be back by the time you get home from the office, and we can continue with this then. I'm making a special meal for you tonight. We'll have a lot to celebrate!" She leaned up and kissed him mischievously, gently nibbling at his lower lip. 

"I suppose I can live without you until then," R mock pouted. "But you must think of me all day! " 

" But of course!" Isobel laughed up at him, looking at him with such love, "How could I help it my darling? Now let me get dressed before I change my mind and continue ravishing you." She trailed her hand slowly down his side as she stood, so clearly not wanting to let go of him. 

R laid back contentedly, hands behind his head, and watched her dress. She was so beautiful, in a way that shone all the way from her soul. For the first time in his wretched life, he was truly happy. Falling in love with Isobel had changed everything. He was no longer the empty cowering wreck he had been, plagued by nightmares of his youth. He had gotten his fears and his temper under control. Just knowing she would be there in the evenings made the days easier. Their life together was everything he could ever have dreamed of. The house was filled to overflowing with love, laughter, and belonging. He could easily believe that never in history had two people so loved each other. 

Finally dressed, Isobel leaned over and kissed him deeply. "I can't wait to get back to you. There's breakfast in the morning room, please eat, you're too thin." She booped his nose playfully and left their sunny room, trailing a subtle expensive perfume behind. 

R stretched and walked naked to the bathroom to grab his robe. Looking in the mirror at himself, he grinned. His hair was mussed from their frisky loveplay, his lips swollen from tender kisses, life was good. Turning around to shuffle into his slippers, he noticed an object in the otherwise empty wastebasket. Curious, he peered at it. He thought he knew what it might be and , hands trembling with hope, fished it out. After studying it a minute, he whooped loudly with utter joy! 

Isobel was pregnant!! He laughed and grinned and cried at the same time. He clapped his hands and spun in circles. A baby! R couldn't believe it! So that's what she meant when she said they had a lot to celebrate! 

R rushed to the phone and began to make plans for the evening. He ordered food, wine, flowers galore, everything he could think of. He spent the day in high excitement, preparing the house, cleaning, placing her beloved roses on every surface. He wanted everything to be perfect when Isobel walked through the front door. 

Except she never did.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

R woke with a jerk,deep in the night, to discover he was soaked in sweat and with tears running down his face. He moaned in misery and shakily tried to stand . After he got his bearings he staggered over to the bar and poured himself another glass of scotch with trembling hands. He drank it down quickly, pouring another one . After a while his fear and pain began to turn into something else, and a loathsome feeling of emptiness began to build in him. With a sharp snarl of rage and self hatred, he strode into the huge gleaming kitchen and rummaged through the drawers, yanking them out in his fury, tossing drawers and utensils aside until he found a large knife.

R practically ran up to Belle's room, cursing darkly the entire way. The look on his face was quite deranged. Slamming into her room, R began furiously stabbing her mattress over and over. He stabbed the pillows, ripped them apart, tore the sheets, threw the glass objects from her vanity across the room, kicked the walls. Finally, still in a frenzy, he threw down the knife. 

R stormed down the hall to his own room. Once there he pulled back a heavy bookcase to reveal a hidden alcove. Here was housed the digital monitoring equipment that surveilled the entire house and grounds. Punching up the code for Belle's bedroom, he flung himself into a chair and spent the remainder or the night watching old recordings of an unsuspecting Belle.

He slowly relaxed once again, watching the soothing images of his wife sleeping, reading, combing her hair. All his, kept safe and sound, locked away, as she should be. 

He began unconsciously to caress himself through his pants, saying to himself she needs me. He palmed his bulge more firmly. The image on the screen changed to one of Isobel dressing in a nightgown he'd bought her, a long silk confection. She was lovely in it. Unaware he was speaking aloud R murmured,"She needs me." 

He slowly unzipped his trousers and took his erect member in hand . Pumping it slowly at first, squeezing tight, he continued to murmur. He watched her slip into bed, turning on her side and sighing. Grunting and panting he pumped harder. He felt a wetness at the tip of his cock, a small bit of precum leaking out, and began to pump faster, seeing her curled up there, absolutely safe in his protected world. As the pressure built and he stroked hard and fast, he didn't realize his murmurs had changed to a gasping, "I need her, I need her."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are going to get very complicated and a mystery will slowly unfold.


	9. What Benefits a Desperate Soul

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you DarkestDearie for your encouragement, you are the best

Belle awoke in her cozy room at the inn and stretched lazily. She had really enjoyed her time with Jefferson the previous evening, and they had made plans to meet again this afternoon. She wondered what she should do with her time until then, and couldn't help thinking of the sweet shy antiques dealer who so resembled her husband. Who was he? Why did he look so much like R? Why was he so alone?

She wondered if she could come up with an excuse to visit the shop again. Maybe she could pick up a souvenir for R. He would like that, to know she had been thinking of him. She ought to call R today and check in, but a part of her rebelled against it. She was enjoying her freedom, the freedom to be how she wanted, without his loving control. He did love her, she knew. And she loved him... but he exhausted her sometimes. It was like living with a ticking bomb, always being aware not to set him off. And trying to know him was frustrating , he never told her anything about his past, got furious if she asked. She knew though, that something terrifying had happened in his childhood. She had heard him crying and calling out during nightmares in the late night. She had so wanted to comfort him, but knew he would never allow it. Sighing, Belle got out of the comfortable bed and got dressed for breakfast.

Entering Granny's, the delicious aromas of pancakes and coffee overwhelmed Belle, and her stomach growled loudly. 

"Someone's hungry!" Laughed an attractive tall waitress. "Here , follow me,got a great table for ya." 

Belle sat at the booth gratefully and took a menu from the smiling girl. 

"I'm Ruby, Good morning! Would you like some coffee?" 

"Would you have any tea?" Belle wondered. "If not, I'll have coffee." 

"Oh, sure , we've got tea, coffee, oj, the works! I'll be right back with that and get your order." Ruby bustled off. 

The bell over the diner door jingled, and Belle glanced up to see the very shopkeeper she had been thinking about. He gave her a shy little smile and wave and walked over to sit at the counter. He was using a cane, Belle hadn't noticed it yesterday. Yet another thing about him to puzzle over. Was the limp something he was born with? Or the result of some illness or accident?

Ruby soon brought her breakfast and Belle set to eating it with great pleasure. The food was excellent in a simple homey way. Once she glanced up to see Mr. Gold looking at her, but he colored and looked away quickly. Belle was charmed by that, he was certainly self conscious. It was cute, she decided. She hadn't ever known a man to be so self effacing, and of course R was never like that. He was confident and swaggering to the extreme.

When Belle finished her meal, she looked around and saw that the antiques dealer had already left. She wasn't sure why she felt such a sharp disappointment. 

After a happy morning spent prowling the little town, Belle headed over to the park that Jefferson had said to meet him in. Since she was early, Belle sat on a bench next to a beautiful little pond. A lovely solitary swan paddled slowly over the smooth glassy surface. The breeze was soft and brought with it the scent of some luscious bloom. 

Belle sighed contentedly and closed her eyes. her life had changed so much in the last few years. She found herself thinking back to the day she had met R.

It had been winter in the city, and she was freezing. She had only a few clothes with her, since she hadn't taken much when she left home. She'd taken off quickly, in fear for her life after the last beating. Her father's drinking and temper seemed to grow worse by the day. Finally, with no other choice she had fled in desperation. Then living on the streets, broke, freezing, she had run out of options. She had nowhere left to run and no one to turn to. She at down in front of a department store and just sobbed her heart out, letting all the wretchedness of her young ruined life flow from her in bitter tears. 

A soft hand cupped her chin and a singsong voice asked,"Whatever is the matter, pet? Surely life cannot be that tragic for one as young as yourself?" The man crouched in front of her, bouncing lightly on his heels. He cocked his head to the side and appeared almost amused. "Are you in need perhaps of some...assistance?"

"Oh, I'm sorry, is this your store? I'll move!" The man was well dressed and obviously wealthy, and Belle felt ashamed and afraid.

"No, dearie, it is certainly not. And unless I'm very much mistaken, you have nowhere to move to." He appeared to study her, his too wide eyes and knowing smile unnerving. His hands fluttered slightly, as if he wished to touch her but didn't want to frighten her. Belle felt he had figured out every thing there was to know about her, and was now calculating what to do with the knowledge. It was a feeling she would become familiar with. But she also thought she saw something broken in his eyes, and he seemed to be genuinely concerned, and she had been without another human's concern for years. So when the laughing man offered to take her for a meal, she went. That decision had saved her life. And changed it completely, into a life she had never imagined for herself. He had given her everything a woman could wish for, and seemed to almost worship her. He had taught her how to behave in high society, how to talk, and dress, and how she should look.

She felt the price she paid was worth it. And he needed her so desperately. Belle wondered what he was doing right now, was he lonely? Was he brokering one of his deals? Did he regret letting her go for the weekend? She hoped he was not miserable, but could not regret this trip. It had allowed her to step back from her life and breathe. She realized what a fishbowl she had been living in, and hoped that R now realized that allowing her a little freedom was no threat to him. Maybe things would ease up from now on, be more relaxed. Belle sighed again and opened her eyes. 

Standing near the edge of the pond was a familiar lean figure in a dark suit. This time Belle did not let the chance slip away. Hastily she stood up and strode over to the man, who stood leaning elegantly on his cane, staring out over the water. "Why, Mr. Gold," Belle exclaimed playfully, "are you following me?"

Gold turned to look at her, and once again she inhaled sharply, seeing his kind eyes. 

"Not at all, dear," she was delighted to see he blushed. "I am accustomed to eating my lunch here every day, but finding my usual bench occupied, I did not wish to disturb you." He had somewhat the same formal way of speaking as R, but without the flourishes and grand gestures. Instead, Gold was very contained, almost old world in his mannerisms. "Seeing the same people constantly is a hazard of small town life," he smiled and looked at the ground.

Belle looked down to see that he had brought a brown bag lunch with him."Please don't let me keep you from your lunch, Mr.Gold, I was just waiting for a friend. "

"In that case, perhaps you would do an old man the courtesy of keeping him company while you wait?" He looked at her hopefully and Belle almost laughed out loud. He really was sweet. 

"I would love to, and you are not old!" He didn't seem old to Belle, who had never really considered the age difference between R and herself. 

"Afraid I am dear, but nothing to be done," Gold chuckled and limped over to the bench.

Belle seated herself as well. "So my dear, what brings you to our little hamlet? It's not much of a tourist Mecca." Gold opened his bag. 

"I just needed a bit of a break," Belle didn't mention the fight with R." Some time to relax and find myself."

"Ah, yes, the pursuit of the young. Whereas when you are old, and full of painful memories, you tend to want to lose yourself." He looked at his hands a moment, turning the cane slowly, then laying it aside.

"Do you have so many painful memories, then?" Belle asked, touched.

"Not so many as some, perhaps." Gold answered, and Belle thought of R, whom she suspected to have far more hard memories than his share.

"And are you finding yourself?" The man asked, looking at her with those soft eyes. 

"I'm beginning to have some idea," Belle laughed. This gentle man was so easy to talk to. They shared his sandwich as they spoke of deep things and silly things, and Belle never noticed that the time for her meeting with Jefferson had passed. 

Meanwhile, Jefferson strode into the park whistling, on his way to meet Belle, when he spotted her on a bench talking animatedly to none other than the town monster. They were turned toward each other, heads almost touching. He watched for a minute, a huge pleased grin on his face, turned on his heel, and walked back the way he had come, whistling all the way.

Eventually, Gold stood up and said reluctantly, "I'm afraid I must be getting back to the shop. I've overstayed my lunch break already. " 

Surprised, Belle glanced at her watch. it had been almost two hours! "Mr. Gold, I'm so sorry, I did t mean to keep you from your work,"Belle said worriedly. 

"Nonsense, dear, it does me good to get out of that dusty old shop. And of course the company was wonderful. How much longer are you staying with us?" 

"I'm afraid I have to head home tomorrow Mr. Gold, but it was lovely to meet you." 

"You too, Belle. If you have the time please stop by the shop to say goodbye before you leave." Belle thought he looked wistful. 

"Of course,Mr. Gold." 

Out of habit Belle had dinner at Granny's that evening. She was hoping to see Mr. Gold there, but he didn't make an appearance. She supposed he ate dinner at home.

"Greetings my lady! May I sit?" Without waiting for an answer Jefferson sat down across from her. "And how are you this lovely evening?"

"You stood me up!" Belle accused. She wasn't really mad, just teasing Jefferson.

"Oh, I didn't stand you up, I merely arrived to find you occupied with a very handsome gentleman and left you to your luck. You know, " he said mischievously, "if he wasn't so damnably straight, I'd go for that myself." 

Belle blushed. "I just happened to run into him there, and we got to talking. Do you know him very well?" 

"Better than most around here. I'm the closest one he could call a friend," Jefferson almost looked sad. "He's never had anyone to call his own, not as long as he's been here. I'm not sure what his deal is, but rumors abound."

"What kind of rumors?" Belle felt ashamed to gossip, but for some reason she felt it was important to know. 

"I shouldn't tell you this, " Jefferson whispered, " as he told it to me in confidence, and generally I would never betray a trust. But," he looked her in the eye, and suddenly a silly man seemed serious,"for some reason, my soul, my heart, tells me you need to know this. It's very important somehow."


	10. Nightmare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is a very short chapter that I needed to put in describing a dream. The reunion chap will be up next.

R was caught in a nightmare.

 

The sheets were tangled around his legs, and although the room was cool,he was sweating profusely. He spun around, turning over and over, moaning piteously in his sleep. There was no relief to be found this cruel night, like most nights it simply hurt.

~~~~~~~~~

The woods were so thick, thorns dragging at his legs at every step he tried to take, branches slapping into his face, uneven ground threatening to trip him. It would be so much easier to go on if he left his injured brother behind, but no, he would never do that. He may be only five, but despite his short and unhappy upbringing, he knew the difference between right and wrong.

He dragged his brother along, worried that it was injuring the mangled leg even further, but what else could he do? In his mind he saw again the car pulling away, leaving them alone, tossed out, and on the way running over his poor unconscious twin's leg, mangling the tiny limb forever.

After what seemed like hours of struggling , he sat down and wept. Why didn't mama and papa want them? Were they bad? They must be, to be left on the side of the road like garbage. They must be the worst children ever born, undeserving of life, underserving of breath, as even the lowliest animals deserved. He must be worthless, a nothing to the world, less than trash in the breeze.

Somehow he would make it through this, he wasn't a helpless baby, he was almost six. Determinedly he wiped away the tears with his little fists and slapped away the mosquitoes feasting on his neck.

He was hungry. They must move on, possibly they could find help before it got too dark. He looked down at his brother, the boy didn't look too good.He was pale, his ankle twisted, the bone obviously badly broken. The small boy shuddered at remembering the car rolling over his brothers small leg, hearing in his mind the loud snap of bone breaking. 

He stood up and grasped his brother under the arms, ready to struggle on, to save his twin.  
~~~~~~~~~~~

R gasped awake.He was shaking, the familiar nightmare having taken its usual toll. He kicked off the sweat sodden sheets, stood up and stretched. Isobel would be home today and there was still a lot to do. Deals to finalize, business to take care of. Also, he couldn't wait for her to be back with him. He couldnt bear the separation. He was incomplete without her.


	11. We are one

Belle was driving home, her head full of strange thoughts. When she had gone to say goodbye to Mr. Gold she struggled not to be overcome by emotion. The things Jefferson told her were overwhelming to her tender heart. She hoped to return to Storybrooke soon, to learn more and visit with her new friends.

Belle had to admit she was anxious to see R again, it had been only a short separation, but they had not been apart since that first meeting. It was strange to be without him. In her mind she couldn't help comparing R and Mr. Gold, looking so alike, and yet so different in personality. She still couldn't fathom how such a thing could be. 

 

R was pacing the floor in the foyer, talking rapidly on his phone. "And you've checked the passenger list carefully? How many? No children on the plane?" He paused to listen. "Yes. Do it." He hung up and continued pacing, so anxious for Isobel to be home. His hands curled and uncurled spastically at his sides. He wanted a drink, but didn't want alcohol on his breath when Isobel finally arrived.

R's phone rang again. "Yes? Yes, be ready to buy the stock as soon as the price crashes. Get a majority share. " again he listened a moment. " Oh, I can guarantee it." He giggled wickedly and hung up.

He continued pacing, grinning maniacally. His scheme was set in motion. That idiot Killian wouldn't know what hit him. R was in a great mood, everything was working out, and any minute Isobel would be home.

He'd gone to some trouble to make himself look nice for her. He wore a soft tailored blue shirt, silk tie,casual trousers and his Gucci loafers. He wanted to appear friendly and approachable. If the homecoming went the way he hoped, he wouldn't remain dressed long. He couldn't wait to feel her small soft body again, to plunder her plush mouth. Just thinking about it had him half hard already, and he licked his lips in anticipation. He picked up a knickknack from a nearby table and fiddled with it nervously. After a moment he set it down and resumed pacing, his hands constantly in motion. After what seemed like hours, he heard the car pulling up in the drive. R quickly ran from the foyer to the grand living room and settled himself casually in a chair. 

He heard the door open and Belle's voice called out,"R, I'm home sweetheart!" 

Trying not to run, R strode into the foyer and took her bag. "Oh, pet, I'm so glad you're home, I missed you so much." Setting the bag aside, he grasped her around the waist and lowered his mouth to hers. After nibbling gently on her lower lip, he softly darted his tongue into her mouth, deepening the kiss.He licked over her teeth, and Belle moaned deep in her throat and twined her hands in his silky hair. R's strong hands moved up her back possessively, one coming to rest against the side of her neck and feeling her roaring pulse. His other hand roamed lazily up to cup her breast, fondling roughly.When he pulled his mouth from hers, Belle was panting and her eyes were sleepy. R Smiled wickedly, it was so easy. 

"How was your trip, my love?"R asked, raising an eyebrow playfully, still holding her around the waist. 

Belle looked slightly dazed as she tried to answer, her knees feeling unsteady. "Oh, it was wonderful, but I missed you so much! I'm glad to be home." She almost told him about the man who resembled him so much, but for some reason she couldn't name, kept it to herself. 

" And I am very glad to have you back where you belong, my love." He kissed her again, deeply and urgently, and this time they were both panting when he broke off. "Come, pet, I have a surprise for you." His eyes twinkled with mischief and Belle followed him into the living room. 

She saw that before a roaring fire, a picnic had been laid out on a fluffy white fur rug, complete with champagne and chocolate covered strawberries on a silver serving dish. Belle felt tears come to her eyes at the thoughtfulness of it.

Belle gave a cry of delight and wrapped her arms around her husband, hugging him tight. After hugging her back he led her over to sit by the fire. Taking the bottle of champagne out of the silver ice bucket, he popped off the cork with a giggle. "A drink, my dear?" At her happy nod he poured the foaming liquid into a crystal flute. After pouring himself one, he clinked his glass to hers and declared,"To having the most beautiful woman on earth all to myself again!"

Belle chuckled a little uneasily. She wasn't sure about that possessive tone, but she was not in the mood to start an argument. R leaned over and fed her a strawberry, it was delicious, juicy and sweet. He gently fed her bits of cheese, bread, and fruit. There was soft music playing. Belle sighed with pleasure.After a while the champagne had her giggly and lightheaded. R slid his hand up her thigh, making her catch her breath as he watched her face intently. He leaned closer and wrapped his other hand around her neck as he lowered his lips to hers. Belle was caught between the sensations of his clever tongue in her mouth and his talented fingers working her mound through her scrap of lace underwear. R drew them off while breathing in her ear and nibbling her earlobe. 

"My God, Isobel, I missed you so much, you are so perfect, so beautiful." All Belle could do was moan in answer as she shuddered and twitched in response to his roving fingers. She could feel how wet she was becoming. Her hips bucked against his hand uncontrollably.She sighed and moaned into his mouth and felt him smirk. His hand around her throat tightened almost uncomfortably. As he inserted first one, then another finger into her tight dampness she felt her mind become hazy, clouded by lust. His mouth, tasting of champagne, was devouring her as his hand worked her, his thumb teasing her throbbing clit. He was quickly bringing the tension in her body to an almost unbearable peak, her toes curling with effort, her entire being clenched so very tight,until R suddenly increased the pressure on her throat until she almost blacked out. He whispered in her ear,"Come." And she did , the orgasm rushing over her like a tidal wave, the pleasure leaving her shuddering and shrieking his name. She collapsed twitching on the rug. 

"Good girl," R said smugly, pleased with himself,"now I have a little present for you" 

Belle watched him stand up and walk to a nearby table. She felt boneless and didn't think she could get up if she wanted to. She watched him pick up a small box and return with it, standing over her for a minute, grinning. God the sight of him still made her hands shake and her stomach clench. She could see the sizable bulge in the front of his trousers, his large erection straining against the fabric. Belle unconsciously licked her lips. 

"Oh don't fret, dearie," he smirked somewhat mockingly, "You'll have plenty of me tonight," he giggled again and sat down next to her. "But first, open your little gift," and he handed her the box. 

Belle took the box from him curiously and popped it open. She gasped when she saw what was inside, a gold ring set with a large flawless deep red ruby carved into the shape of a rose. Two small leaf carved emeralds sparkled on either side. It was exquisite and she didn't know what to say, so she leaned over and gave him a lingering kiss. Finally he pulled away and murmured, "Well, lets see how it looks on, shall we?" He took the ring out of the box and slid it onto her finger."There now, a one of a kind beauty for a one of a kind beauty."

"Thank you," Belle whispered," I love you." 

"As I love you my pet." R surged up against her and used his body weight to push her down into the soft fur, lying on top of her.He began kissing her somewhat roughly, as his hands roamed her body, kneading and squeezing her hips and breasts. He left her mouth to place hot kisses down her neck, biting and sucking, then pulling open her shirt to suck at one breast, pulling the nipple into his hot mouth and teasing with lips and tongue the hardened little nub.Meanwhile his hand plucked at her other nipple, pulling and tweaking. Belle gasped, already again terribly aroused. His hips were bucking against her, grinding his hard erection against her, fueling her desire. She felt his tongue circle her nipple, then moaned aloud as he softly bit with his teeth. He moved to the other nipple, sucking and licking and biting. Belle thought she might cry out, it was driving her crazy, his teasing, it wasn't enough. 

"Please, please," Belle begged as she knew he liked. She was beginning to feel desperate. "Please, sweetheart," she breathed shakily. 

He slid a hand up her thigh and rubbed it through her wet folds circling around her clit, making her gasp into his mouth. He smiled as he slipped a finger into her dripping cunt and thrust rhythmically. "Isobel, you're so wet for me, so hot." R groaned. He added second finger and Isobel moaned, riding his hand shamelessly. He picked up the pace with his thrusting fingers, using his other hand to knead her breasts, all the while devouring her mouth with his clever tongue.

Belle was so close, then let out a small breathy scream when he suddenly pulled away. "Take this dress off," R commanded, and Belle yanked it over her head and started to lie back down. "No," said R sternly, wait." 

She watched as he slowly pulled off his silk tie and unbuttoned his shirt, affording her a glimpse of his smooth lean chest. Belle was practically salivating as he removed the shirt. "Now, turn around,pet. " He made a circling motion with his hand. Belle obeyed, wondering with anticipation what he was up to now. In just a moment she felt cool silk slide across her skin as he teased her shoulders with his tie, and she shuddered with delight. 

"Wrists together behind your back, pet," purred R wickedly. 

Once again Belle did as she was told, not without a tiny frisson of fear, as she felt R use the silk to bind her wrists together. 

"There now, " R sounded smug,"Is it comfortable, not too tight?" 

"It - its fine," Belle stammered, almost overcome by lust. She heard the sound of a zipper opening and was already so worked up that she almost came from that sound alone. R leaned into her, whispering low and dangerous in her ear, "And are you ready my dear, for what I'm going to do to you?" 

Dear God, that growling velvet voice! It reached down inside her and caressed and tormented her, she moaned and thrust her hips forward uncontrollably. 

R laughed darkly, not his giggle, but a deep masculine sound just this side of cruel. She felt his hands slide down to her shoulders and gently urge her to lean forward. With R balancing her by holding onto her bound wrists, he arranged her so that she was positioned up on her knees, but with her chest and face buried in the soft white rug. Belle turned her face to the side so that she could breathe. She was aware that with her ass in the air and her arms bound behind her back that she was in a very vulnerable position.

R soothed her by running his hands up and down her back. "My beautiful pet, my Isobel," he crooned softly. He knelt up on his knees behind her, kneading her perfect ass, his hard cock twitching at the sight of it, a bead of precum forming at the slit. He pushed at the small of her back, arching her ass further up, so she resembled a cat in heat. He reached his hand under to check that she was wet enough, and gathered some of the copious moisture to lubricate his aching member. Grasping her firmly by the hips he thrust forward suddenly into her sopping cunt, sheathing himself completely, as Belle screamed her pleasure.

R pulled almost out and thrust back in, holding her hips tight enough to bruise, pounding into her over and over. She felt like wet silk, gripping his cock tightly, swallowing him. He yanked her hips toward him, trying to get deeper, thrusting mercilessly as Belle lost her mind to the sensations, her head thrashing back and forth. R felt his orgasm building, getting ready to wash over him, and he reached one hand down and flicked at Belle's hidden little nub. Belle came with a scream, her velvet walls clamping around his cock.

In his excitement, R gabbed her by the bound wrists, bending her body back torwards his so that she was forced to rise off the floor. He slammed into her wildly, his thrusts becoming erratic, until he felt his balls pull up tight and he roared as he pulsed, shooting his hot seed inside her. 

Lowering Belle gently down, R collapsed beside her, breathing heavily. After a while, he removed the tie, massaging her wrists. He smoothed back her sweaty hair, and gave her a deep but tender kiss. "We belong together, my love. We are one."

*************************************************** 

They lay in front of the fire a long time, caressing each other lightly, enjoying the closeness as the sweat dried on their skin. After a time, Belle's head began to droop. R gathered her up in his strong arms and carried her up the stairs to her room. He settled her comfortably in her bed, kissing her lips and then her forhead. Belle was almost asleep. As he pulled the covers up to her chin, he just caught a low murmur. "Gold," she sighed. 

R shrugged his shoulders and switched off her bedside lamp. He tiptoed from her room and softly locked her door as he left.Yes she was back where she belonged and would never need to leave again.

R returned to the living room and checked the clock. Not time yet. He cleaned up the remains of the picnic and picked up their discarded clothing. Glancing at the clock again he saw he had just enough time to pour a drink. After fetching a tumbler of scotch, he arranged himself comfortably on the couch and clicked on the tv. The late night news was on, and the leading story was a tragedy. R leaned forward as the anchor announced,"Twenty passangers were burned alive on a commuter plane belonging to Jones industries this evening. Officials have yet to determine what started the blaze, which quickly engulfed the plane before takeoff. Let's go to our man on the scene." 

The screen showed an eager reporter standing in front of a blackened burned out ruin of a plane, ambulances in the background.The reporter began to drone on about the accident. R leaned back, his lips twitching, then pulling up into a half grin. Soon maniacal giggles were echoing in the cavernous room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter we will possibly discover what happened to the original Isobel


	12. Isobel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happened to the original Isobel

After leaving the house, Isobel got into her low slung sports car and threw her reporter's bag into the passenger seat. Putting the car in gear she pulled out of the driveway and roared off down the road. She was not a careless driver, but a confident one. She would rather have stayed home with R and celebrated the news she couldn't wait to share with him. Also she was not looking forward to interviewing Killian Jones. She had met him a few times before and found him extremely distasteful. The smarmy wanker always seemed to be imagining what she looked like naked, and often made suggestive and lewd remarks. The bastard made her skin crawl, if the truth be known.

However, Isobel was a professional and would get through this interview. She was to meet him at one of the hangars housing airplanes for his business, she planned to ask her questions, get some pictures, and get out. She turned up the radio and sang along, looking forward to getting back home and telling R the good news. Things couldn't possibly get any better for them. Life was perfect. She drove contentedly for about an hour. 

Spying the turnoff to the hangar up ahead, Isobel signaled and pulled onto the dirt road. The place was in the middle of nowhere. As she pulled up to the building and put the car in park, Jones came strolling out through the open wall of the hangar. Isobel grit her teeth and grabbed her bag, exiting the car. 

"There you are, love! Ready to see everything?" He smiled suggestively. Ugh, this wasn't going to be pleasant. 

Isobel pretended not to notice the double entendre. Hoisting her bag over her shoulder she gestured at the hangar," Shall we find a seat and begin the interview?"She wanted no small talk, just to get down to business. 

"Of course, sweetheart, anything you like." He winked at her and ran his eyes over her figure. He turned and motioned towards the door,"Ladies first." 

Isobel began walking toward the entrance, extremely uncomfortable as she could feel his eyes crawling all over her ass. Once they entered the building she looked around for a place to sit, but didn't see anything. 

"I have a small office here, we'll be quite comfy in there, love." 

Isobel said coldly, "If you don't mind, I'd prefer if you would call me Isobel and not love or sweetheart." 

Isobel saw Jones' eyes flash with anger and his lips tighten, but then he schooled his face into a friendly look and replied,"Of course, whatever you like, Isobel." He managed to make her name sound dirty. "This way." Jones led her into a small office containing a messy desk and a small couch, which he immediately flopped down on, propping his feet on a table, and patting the couch next to him. 

Reluctantly Isobel sat down and took out her notebook. The small size of the sofa meant that she had to sit very close to him, which she definitely did not like. Still, she took a deep breath and asked her first question.

"Mr. Jones, your business has been growing quickly this last year, do you plan to expand, and if so, will you remain in the same location?" 

"We are going to be expanding,"he grinned," and towards that end we have already begun construction. It will not be at the same location, but we will remain local and continue to employ local people, in fact there will be many new jobs created. We'll have much more room for growth there. We already have one hangar built, and we'll be constructing several more. We plan to incorporate offices, a restaurant, fuel station, and a viewing port for plane watchers." Jones smiled with obvious pride. 

Isobel was relieved that Jones seemed to have forgotten his lecherous manner while speaking of his business. "And what other new projects are you planning in the future?" 

Jones looked excited, "We are at the forefront of some marvelous new technology. For the past few years we have been developing an electric aircraft, which we believe to be the wave of the future. My business is environmentally conscious. And," here he leaned forward as if to impart some secret knowledge, "we have completed our first model." 

This news was exciting to Isobel. It was just the kind of hook to take a story from ho hum to most talked about. She looked at Jones with wide eyes. 

"The model happens to be at our new facility, which just happens to be down this very road." He looked at her slyly. "How would you like to get some pictures of it for your article?"

Isobel nodded,"That's very kind of you,Mr. Jones, I would love that." 

"I was counting on it," Jones muttered under his breath as Isobel went to gather her bag. 

As Isobel was heading out the door, Jones called out,"Ill be right with you, just have to grab my jacket!" He sauntered over to the coat tree next to his desk and picked up a dark leather jacket. Shrugging it on, he smirked as he slid open a desk drawer and retrieved a dark oily looking gun, which he slid into the back waistband of his tight jeans. 

Isobel was standing by her car when he came out. "Do you mind if I drive?" She inquired. 

"No, not at all," grinned Jones. Something about that grin unnerved her, but Isobel just had to get this story, so she climbed behind the wheel and unlocked the passenger door for him to slide in. "It's straight down this road, " he told her, pointing.

Isobel drove silently for awhile, feeling unexeplicably nervous. Suddenly Jones piped up,"You know, I've known your husband for a time, and I can't imagine it's easy being married to the likes of him." 

"What do you mean?!" Isobel was highly offended."He is a wonderful husband, and a kind, warm man." 

Jones snorted. "Not from what I've known of him. He's a conniving son of a bitch and ruthless in his business dealings, I'd go so far as to say dishonest and worse." He scowled darkly. 

Isabel glanced at him sideways, furious. "Mr. Jones. I am here for an interview only, and I will not hear your slander against my husband. Please keep your ridiculous opinions to yourself." 

Jones ground his teeth together and spat out, "Perhaps it's time for you to open your eyes to what a real man should be, forget that sniveling little coward!"

"Mr. Jones! I have had more than enough! This interview is over!" Isobel started to turn the car around. 

"Oh, I think not, love,"Killian ground out. He grabbed her hand and crushed it under his, preventing her from turning the wheel. "Stop the car," he ordered. 

"No!" Shouted Isobel, she was truly frightened now. "Let go of me, you bastard!" 

Suddenly there was a sharp hard blow to the back of her head. Isobel shrieked in pained surprise. "I said stop the car. Now!" shouted Jones. 

Terrified, Isobel did as he demanded. She was shaking with fear and hot anger. She could see the open contempt on his face, mixed with a leering desire. 

Jones reached over and took the keys from the ignition, pocketing them. He leaned over until Isobel could smell his rank breath, and forced his mouth on hers, holding the back of her head tightly while his other hand pawed at her clothing roughly. 

Isobel gagged, overcome with disgust. She clawed at his face, scoring bloody furrows in his cheek. She was panicked. Jones let go of her with a roar and struck her on the side of the head so hard that her ears rang and her head snapped to the side. Like lightning he grabbed her by her long black hair and slammed her face into the dashboard, breaking her nose. "Get out of the car, you bitch. I've had enough shit from your husband and enough from you!" He shoved her, hard. "Get out now, bitch!" 

Sobbing, petrified, and in pain, Isobel scrambled out of the car and started desperately to run. A loud crack sounded from behind her and something whizzed by her ear. 

"Stop!" Yelled Jones,"Stop right there or I'll shoot you!" 

Isobel froze, then, hyperventilating, she slowly turned to look at Jones. His face was twisted with a murderous fury and he was stalking towards her. When he reached her he shoved her brutally to the ground, and straddling her began to tear at her clothes, holding the gun to her head. Isobel wept bitterly as he fondled her, and as he began to remove her pants, the rage built up inside her and she grabbed at his head and pulled his greasy hair, then began punching him as hard as she could. She couldn't get free but fought like a wildcat. She tried to yank the gun from his hand, but suddenly she felt a huge pressure slam into the side of her head, like a punch from a giant. It registered in her mind that she'd been shot. The world appeared blood red for a second. As it faded to black her last thought was regret that she'd never see R, her true love, again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have always hated Killian. Next chapter will show more about R and Belle. Gold will be back soon.


	13. Dinner And A Show

Belle sat at her dressing table, once again preparing for a party. This time it would be a dinner party at their own house to celebrate that R had finally acquired Jones industries. While coaxing an errant curl into place, Belle stole a glance at R, his slim decadent figure lounging in the window frame. Her eyes slid down to his pert tight ass, shown to advantage in the custom cut trousers. 

R turned to look at her and smiled, a small and thoughtful smile, cold, contemptuous, and oddly sensuous.

Belle blushed, caught in her open admiration of him. R's expression turned to one of cynical amusement as he strode over to grasp her by the hair and yank her head backward. He kissed her deeply, swirling his tongue in her mouth and catching her gasps in his mouth. He shoved her away," Hurry up and get ready, we don't have all night." Laughing, He strode out of the room as belle tried to catch her her breath. His casual cruelty was nothing new to her, but still could hurt her with an unexpected sharpness.

She knew this dinner was important to him, he'd been trying to acquire that company for years. Luckily for him the stock had crashed and he was able to cheaply buy a majority share of the company. Somehow an accident had caused one of the company's planes to catch fire on the runway. For some reason the door had been stuck and the passengers couldn't escape. Belle shivered at the tragedy of it. It didn't seem right to celebrate. The CEO of the company was ruined, a laughingstock in the cruel business world. He would likely never run a company again. Dozens of relatives of the victims were suing him.

Belle walked over to the bed to pick up her gown. This time R had chosen for her a sapphire velvet dress and she slid it carefully on. It was a beautiful gown and she looked breathtaking in it. She left her room and descended the stairway to the dining room. 

Peeking into the dining room she saw that the caterers had set a gorgeous table, gleaming silver, abundant flowers and candles. R was nowhere in sight and she heard piano music from the living room. Belle entered that room to see R , his elegant fingers running over the keys, playing a song she didn't recognize. He didn't notice her standing there and she took the moment to study his unguarded face. The usual cynical look was absent, replaced by one that suggested deep sadness and secret pain. She wondered what he was thinking of or remembering that had him looking so very broken-hearted. There was so much about her husband that she didn't know. 

R looked up to see Belle there and his usual cool mask slid once more over his face. "You look lovely, pet. Come here." He patted his knees and Belle walked over to him and sat in his lap, running her hands through his satiny hair. He leaned his head back into her hands, closing his eyes and sighing with pleasure. Belle leaned down and kissed him tenderly. 

"Here, sweetheart, something to go with your dress." He removed a box from his tuxedo pocket and opened it to show her a glittering necklace of perfect sapphires, along with matching ear drops. 

Belle gasped, "oh, it's lovely!" She flung her arms around him and kissed him, "Thank you!" 

R placed the sapphires around her neck and handed her the earrings. "No other woman can compare to you, Isobel." As they were once again kissing the doorbell rang. 

"Time to celebrate!" R giggled and leaped up lightly, "Come my dear, it's showtime!" 

*************************** The mood at the dinner table was lively, and the champagne flowed freely. R presided from his seat at the head of the table like a king. Belle was seated to his right, and merely tried to smile and look interested at what the others were saying, but had no great interest in business deals or politics. She was daydreaming a bit when she realized the woman next to her had been speaking to her. "I'm sorry, I didn't catch that," said Belle somewhat embarrassed. The woman, beautiful in a cold overblown way, repeated her question. 

"I asked you, dear, isn't it a lucky... coincidence, that that plane caught fire when it did?" The woman smiled a very nasty smile. 

"What? I wouldn't call that horrible fire lucky!" 

"Oh, well of course not," the woman continued to smile," But I know for a fact your husband has been angling to put Jones' nose out of joint for a while, and he certainly was quick to take advantage of the situation. Almost as if he knew about it ahead of time." She raised a dark eyebrow. 

"What are you implying?" Yelped Belle, drawing R's attention. 

"Regina!" He snapped,"Lets have none of your vicious gossip tonight. If you upset my darling wife I will be very," he gave her a significant look, measuring each word like a drop of poison," displeased with you." 

Regina smirked but said no more about it.

By the time the party was winding down Belle was exhausted.She had been very careful to do nothing to anger or embarrass her husband, but all of the guests seemed to her to always have hidden meanings behind their words, and to constantly make little digs and innuendos at each other. She didn't enjoy it, but R seemed to. No one at the table was a match for his acerbic wit, and he appeared to have a ball making fools of them all. He seemed especially to enjoy rattling the woman Regina and her sister Zelena. Belle thought them a couple of snakes, making backhanded compliments to her all evening. After one such veiled insult R gave Zelena a cold supercilious stare and she snapped her mouth shut and turned white. She had nothing more to say after that, to Belle's relief.

Just as the last of the guests were preparing to leave, the front door flew open, and there stood unsteadily the very man whose ruin R was celebrating. He was wobbling on his feet and obviously drunk. He shouted"You! You crocodile! I know you did this to me and I WILL prove it!" He started to enter the room but Dove materialized behind him and grabbed him by the throat, lifting the man out of the doorway and out into the yard. 

"Please excuse me a moment," said R, unruffled. He swaggered out the front door after Dove, a malicious grin on his face. He'd been waiting for this. 

Belle stood in the room with her mouth hanging open, unsure what to do. "I'm so sorry," she said to the two remaining guests, elderly gentlemen whose names had slipped her mind. "I have no idea what's going on. Please, let me get you a drink." She poured the drinks and tried to make small talk, wondering what R was doing outside. This night had been too much for her, she was a nervous wreck and just wanted to go to bed and forget it all. She was confused and too tired to think straight. She felt that she couldn't make sense of anything. 

After a little while R came back in alone, still grinning savagely. He took Belle's hand and tried to reassure her,"Everything is fine, pet. Dove has the intruder immobilized and the police are on their way. Why don't you go up to your room and I'll be up after I get our guests on their way and talk to the police?" 

Belle was relieved to go. She would worry about it all tomorrow. She kissed her husband goodnight and went up the stairs to her room.

************************************

After the police left, with a drunken screaming Killian Jones, R went to the living room and poured himself a drink. He was feeling very satisfied with the evening's work. For a while he had worried that Jones wouldn't show up in time for there still to be witnesses about. The police had their names and numbers and would likely question them. Of course, R made sure they knew exactly what to say. Jones was finished, he thought with a sadistic smirk. He had protested that he didn't know how that gun got on him, but R and his witnesses would swear in court that Jones had threatened R's life with it. It had been easy enough to slip the weapon on him while Dove was holding him, Jones too drunk to notice. So he had taken the bastard's business and his freedom. Just one thing left to do to him and revenge would be complete. R swaggered to the table and took a small bottle and tiny silver spoon out of his pocket. Time to celebrate properly with some top quality blow. 

He went, sniffing, up the stairs through his room to his hidden alcove. Turning on the surveillance in Isobel's room he saw she was already asleep. She looked sweet and innocent in her bed with the moonlight on her face. So young and beautiful, his finger reached out and lightly touched her image on the screen. He sat there for hours, in his tremendous loneliness, just watching.


	14. A Diversion Or Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fun and smut....because you know what's coming

Belle awoke the next morning to bright sunlight spilling into her room, she had slept later than usual. She exited the bed, and after using the bathroom and brushing her teeth, she sat down at her dressing table to do her hair. She brushed it until it shone, gleaming waves falling down her back. Her mind was awhirl with the outrageous events of the previous evening. Why had that strange man accused her husband of doing, well, she wasn't sure what. Just then R entered her room, carrying a tray of croissants, fresh cherries,and cream. He poured her a glass of orange juice and waved his hand dramatically at the food. 

"Here you are, my darling, a little something to start the day." R grinned crookedly at her. He sat on her bed, looking devilish in his black silk dressing gown, his large eyes sparkling with mischief. He looked down at the bed and back to her with an exaggerated expression of innocence. 

Belle couldn't help but laugh at his antics as she accepted the glass and sat next to him. She took a sip of the juice and then he moved closer, sliding his hand up her back and pressing himself against her, he gave her a lingering passionate kiss that left her head reeling. 

"I have a little diversion planned for us today, to get you off the property and enjoying some freedom," R told her, and Belle was surprised and delighted. 

"Oh what is it? Tell me!" She looked up at him with shining eyes, so excited she forgot all of her earlier dark questions.

"You'll just have to wait and see, pet," he smiled as he stuck his finger into the cream and licked it slowly off. He saw Belle's breath hitch in her chest and her pupils widen. He knew she would have questions about the events at the party, and ever the master manipulator, he didn't intend to have to answer them. R stuck his finger into the cream again, and this time he placed it on her lip, then gently used the tip of his tongue to wipe the cream off her mouth and take it into his own, licking his lips. He ran his elegant hands up her thighs and sighed into her mouth,"I just want to make you happy, I love you so much." He nibbled her earlobe and down the side of her neck, and Belle shivered in his arms, relaxing into an erotic stupor as he continued to kiss and caress her.

R undressed her slowly, tongue trailing over every inch of skin he exposed as Belle sighed and gasped beneath him. He bent his head down to her center and tongued a long slow streak along her clit, causing Belle to grasp his hair and cry out. He circled her entrance with his fingers and lapped at her lazily until she was twitching and panting in desire. He reached out a hand to the tray and plucked up two cherries. Popping one into his mouth, he pushed the other into her soaking entrance. 

"Oh, "gasped Belle, "what are you doing?" 

"Why I'm saving some for later!" Laughed R, licking at her playfully. He quickly plucked up two more cherries and did it again, moaning with pleasure at the mixture of tastes. 

Belle loved it when R was in one of his whimsical moods, he could be so sweet and fun. But soon all thoughts went flying out of her head as he began to thrust his tongue deeply inside her and then flick it directly on her aching nub, grasping her behind firmly with both hands as he devoured her. He started thrusting his hips into the bed as Belle moaned and shouted her pleasure to the ceiling. Both of their movements became more frenzied , their breathing ragged,until Belle's toes curled up and she came hard, flooding his mouth with cherry flavored nectar. R groaned and shuddered and came against the bed in long powerful spasms.They lay there, panting and sweaty, both of them smiling at each other.

"Well," observed Belle when she could breathe again,"that was certainly a diversion." 

R laughed heartily, a sound Belle hadn't heard from him in a long time. "That is only the beginning my lady. I have quite the adventure planned for you." He held out his hand and helped her to stand up. " You go get your bath, and I will locate something suitable for you to wear on your journey." He bowed grandly, and Belle giggled and kissed him, skipping into her bathroom.

The deep claw foot tub was large, and after filling it with hot water, Belle lay back and relaxed. She felt satisfied and happy. Humming to herself she closed her eyes and slipped into a half doze. The water was warm and soothing and fragrant with rose scent. Wait a minute! She hadn't... Belle opened her eyes to see her her husband throwing masses of pink rose petals into the bath, smiling impishly. "Enjoying your bath,sweetheart? I'm certainly enjoying the view." He trailed one hand through the water, lightly up her stomach to her chest, to pinch and roll a nipple in his nimble fingers. Belle was instantly aroused, and leaned over to him for a tender kiss. 

"You'd better stop or we'll never make it out f the house, and I want my adventure!"Belle gasped. 

R stood up and smirked,"I've left you something on the bed. Come down when you're dressed." He was looking mighty pleased with himself. R turned smartly on his heel, and left her suite, still smiling. 

After drying off with a large fluffy towel, Belle padded into her bedroom. The bed had been made and a large golden wrapped box with a bow sat on top. With a cry of delight Belle rushed over to open it. Inside was a new outfit, presumably what R wished for her to wear. There was a pair of dark chocolate riding pants, which when she pulled them on, fit her body like a glove. The there was a champagne colored silk blouse, also a perfect fit. It felt so light on her, so sensuous. In the bottom of the box were a pair of very expensive leather riding boots and a chocolate velvet riding helmet. Belle was ecstatic, the costume was beautiful and told her everything she needed to know about the adventure ahead of her. She was so excited she squealed as she headed to the mirror to braid her hair. There on her dresser was yet another little gift box, and when she opened it, to her amusement and slight embarrassment, there was a cunning little pin of gold fashioned to look like twin cherries on stems. Belle giggled, "Oh R, you are naughty," she murmured to herself.

Sometime later, satisfied with her makeup and hair, and pinning the golden cherries to her shirt, Belle flew down the stairs, eager to greet her husband and enjoy a day outside. When Bell reached the living room she stopped dead still and her jaw dropped. Her husband was lounging insolently against his piano, just standing next to the keyboard and runnng his fingers lightly over the keys. He was wearing tall black leather riding boots over a pair of skin tight riding breeches that took her breath away. They left very little to the imagination.His silky shirt was open at the neck, showing a tantalizing slice of lean tanned chest. In one hand he held a riding crop which he slapped lightly against his thigh. Belle shut her mouth with a snap, and she tried to swallow, but her throat was too dry. 

R narrowed his eyes with slightly malicious amusement. "See something you like,dear?" He spread his hands wide. 

Unable to say anything,Belle simply nodded. R laughed, and scooping her up, marched out with her and settled her in the car. As they drove out towards the country, R speeding ,naturally, Belle couldn't help but sneak glances at her handsome husband. Of course she knew he was aware of it as he always was, and pleased about it if his smug look was any indication . But Belle didn't care, she loved him, they were going to the country, and she was blissfully happy. 

Pastures began to appear on both sides of the roads, some with large black and white cows grazing in the grass contentedly. Belle laughed as one of the creatures lifted its huge head, and lowed at her mournfully. There were barns too, sometimes three all in a row,the first one all but falling down, the second dilapidated but standing, and the third new. It seemed as a barn rotted away the farmers would simply erect a new one right alongside the old. Belle rolled down her window and breathed in the clean country air, she had not felt so carefree in along time. R reached over and took her hand. "Isobel I swear I will do whatever it takes to make you happy, to protect you. You know that." 

Belle looked at him, "of course I know that." 

"I-its just that I don't ever want you to doubt me. I have enemies who will do or say anything to discredit me, and I don't think I could live if you quit believing in me. You're all a have in the world, all that's important to me." He spoke quietly, with a kind of wary desperation, like he didn't really think anyone could believe in him. 

Belles heart went out to him. Those awful people at the party, the savage gossips. And that unhinged Jones, R had told her he actually brought a gun to their house!

"I wouldn't listen to those vile people. And I know you will always protect me."

His hand squeezed hers and then he brought her hand to his lips and kissed it gently. Belle put the doomed dinner party out of her mind.

At last they pulled up to a very modern looking barn with a large fenced area. A sign read,"Three Bears Farm". R helped Belle out of her side of the car and led her towards the building. Belle looked up at him nervously,"I don't really have any experience riding horses." 

"You don't have to worry about a thing,pet. You will be riding a very gentle and experienced gelding. He knows the trail perfectly well and won't put a hoof out of place." R smiled down at her. "You can trust me." 

Just then a cheerful looking woman and man came out of the barn leading two horses. The woman, who had a dark pixie cut, waved at them. She was leading a small gray horse with huge dark eyes. The blonde haired man was leading what seemed to Belle a gigantic black horse, a glossy and gorgeous beast. 

"Belle," smiled R, "This is Mr. and Mrs. Nolan. They own the ranch and were kind enough to rent us these horses for our ride today." 

"They're beautiful," breathed Bell. Mrs. Nolan took Belle and the grey gelding toward the paddock to explain the basics to her and show her how to mount and sit a horse. She led her around the ring a few times for practice. 

R spoke to David Nolan, "I trust you have arranged everything as I instructed?" 

"Yes, I'm sure that it will all be to your satisfaction,sir," David smiled a friendly smile. 

R did not smile back. "See that it is," he ordered menacingly, and felt a spiteful pleasure as Nolan's Adam's apple bobbed nervously. He knew there was no need to be cruel, it was just his nature. 

******************************** 

Belle was enjoying the ride immensely. The trail through the woods was lovely and she felt a marvelous sense of freedom. Just ahead of her rode R on the tall black horse, keeping an eye out for any obstructions in the path. He was taking no chances with her safety. Belle was glad at first ,because his position in front of her afforded her an excellent view of his ass in the tight pants. But, try as she might to focus on the beauty of the nature around her, her eyes kept getting drawn back to the beauty of the nature in front of her. Damn, why did he have to have such a fine ass? It was beyond distracting. Belle felt a growing moisture between her thighs and bouncing up and down on the horse wasn't helping. OK, I just won't look, she thought. She looked around at the trees, tried to listen to the birdsong. The woods are so beautiful, she told herself desperately. I'm enjoying the scenery. Her eyes slid again to his tight backside and she moaned quietly. No, not that scenery! I can't take this, she thought, look at it! Just look at it!

As the ass in question continued to bob hypnotically up and down on the horse in front of her, Belle's self control was unraveling. She began to imagine grasping those ass cheeks in her hands and squeezing, running her mouth over them, nipping at the flesh. Up and down it went in the tight pants. Belle's breath was coming faster now, and she shoved a fist into her mouth to stifle a moan. This was torture! Then she took her hands off the reins and framed the ass with her hands, her tongue sticking out of her mouth. God, I'd like to just take a big juicy bite. She felt desperate to touch it. Still, there it was, bouncing up and down right in front of her face, tormenting her. Belle pressed a hand against her crotch, groaning and grinding against the saddle. She felt sweaty and disheveled and overwrought.Up and down went the ass, up and down went her eyes. She began to think she was slightly hysterical. Could you go mad over the sight of an exceptionally fine ass in a tight pair of pants? Suddenly R turned in the saddle and looked down at her with a familiar knowing smirk, laughter in his eyes. Damn him! The rotten bastard had been doing it on purpose! He knew exactly what she was thinking, what he had been doing to her. He looked overly smug, pleased to have her in this humiliating position. 

"Damn you and your hot ass," Belle shouted, laughing. "I'll get you back for this!" 

R turned smoothly back around, laughing,"you'll have your chance in a moment pet. Here we are." 

Belle gasped as the entered a forest clearing with wildflowers growing in abundance, and a clear deep pool in the center. A table was set up with a cloth and a delicious looking lunch had been set out. R swung off his horse and hurried over to help Belle dismount. He took her hand and led her to the table. 

"Do you like it, Isobel?" He looked at her hopefully. 

"Darling, I love it, it's the most wonderful thing anyone's ever done for me!" 

Scooping her up once again, he gently lay her down on a thick blanket covered with bright pillows, and proceeded to do more wonderful things for her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, I got distracted by Rumplestiltskin's ass, like I often do. The damn thing should come with a warning.


	15. Let The Games Begin

When they got back that evening and he had Isobel all tucked safely in, R explained to her that he had to go out of town on some business,"I'll only be gone a couple of days, but want you to stay safe. If you'll promise me you'll stay n the house, I'll leave your door unlocked. You can walk the grounds if Dove is with you, but under no circumstances are you to leave the property. I mean it Isobel. If I find you have disobeyed me there will be serious consequences." He gave her a flat dead eyed look and Isobel shivered. "Darling, it's for your own good. With that insane Jones free on bail, I can't be sure of your safety. After the trial I'll give you more freedom, I swear it." But his eyes slid uneasily away from hers. 

******************* 

"Well, you are in a predicament,aren't you?"

R stood over a trussed up Jones, grinning wickedly. They were in one of R's warehouses, where no one would interrupt them, and he had all the time in the world to enjoy this. "Well now, are you quite comfortable?" R asked, lifting an eyebrow. "Are you cold? It's a little chilly in here, would you perhaps like a sweater?" He eyed Jones with patently false concern, laughter in his cold eyes.

Jones tried to make speech through his gag, but was unintelligible. His ankles were bound together, and his wrists were tied tightly together behind his back. 

"What's that?"R held a hand up behind his ear, theatrically."Can't understand you, dearie. Speak up!" R smacked Jones hard on the side of the head. "It's very rude to mumble." 

Jones glared. 

R strode over to a table against the wall that had a hot plate and tea kettle. He began making preparations to boil water for tea, ignoring Jones for a while. After he set the pot to boil, he pulled up a chair and sat down to read a newspaper, crossing his legs casually. "Oh, look, here's my picture in the paper, in front of my new company." He showed the restrained man a picture of him in front of the what used to be Jones' air taxi service. "Says I saved the company from a dangerously incompetent CEO. Well, that would be you. Wouldn't it?" R shook his head sadly. "Why they practically call you a murderer. You let all those innocent people to die, shame." R made a little moue and fluttered his hands at Jones. 

Jones grumbled through the gag again. R stood up suddenly and delivered a brutal roundhouse kick to Jones' jaw. Jones head snapped to the side and blood flew. "I believe I told you not to mumble," R said pleasantly."really, there's no call to be so rude. We are, after all, somewhat long term acquaintances. I wouldn't go so far as to say friends, what do you think?" R looked at him with a faux curiosity. 

Jones just glared at him again, hatred burning in his eyes. 

"Now, now, you don't have to stare at me so adoringly. I'm well aware of your consuming admiration of me," R giggled nastily."Though flattery will get you everywhere, and I expect you'll flatter me in every way I deem necessary." He grabbed Killian by his hair and yanked his head up painfully. "I want you to pay close attention, dearie, because I have some information you need to hear." 

Jones tried to turn his head, but R held his jaw in an iron grip. "Look me in the eyes." 

Killian closed his eyes. 

R laughed maliciously and walked over to pick up the boiling kettle. Swaggering back over to his victim he grinned and poured the boiling water over the tied mans head, giggling at his high pitched screams." Now," R put a finger under Jones' chin and lifted his blistering face, "Look at me,dearie," he purred.

Jones looked this time. R smiled. 

"Ah, that's better!" R clapped his hands in vindictive delight. "Perhaps if you behave I can give you something for the burns. But, " he paused, "no, probably not," another giggle."Now look at me," ordered R in a voice like winter in the arctic. 

Killian looked into his captors' eyes. Huge Madeira colored eyes stared back at him, the pupils blown wide like a hunting leopards' ,purely predatory. Sharp teeth grinned at him with savage glee, there was absolutely no trace of mercy in that face. Jones realized then he probably wasn't getting out of this alive, and the best he could hope for was to minimize the pain.

"Now that I have your undivided attention, I would like to inform you what will happen to your legacy, if you do not give me what I consider satisfying answers to my questions. I have your company in my control now, everything you ever worked for, all that people will ever know of you, I plan to take it apart, disassemble your work until there is nothing left. It will be as if you Never. Even. Existed. Nothing left of you on this planet, you will have become a total ,complete, and utter ," here R leaned in close and whispered in Jones' ear, "Nothing."

Jones choked and spluttered beneath his gag. He could honestly imagine nothing worse than being erased from this earth, humiliated for all generations. He'd worked too hard, come too far. 

R went over to the table and picked up an instrument that resembled a thick stick with a wire coming out one end and connecting to a rheostat plugged into a wall socket. It had two metal plugs in the other end. "This," explained R, "is called a picana. It is a design based off of a tool known as a cattle prod. That tool was used to herd cattle into slaughter. " Here he fiddled with rheostat causing the thing to emit an electrical hum. "This design was perfected specifically for the torture of human beings. The intensity can be dialed up or down as needed, and the torture can go on for a very long period of time." R stood over Jones and touched the baton to Jones face. The man screamed behind his gag, his body twitching an jerking uncontrollably, his eyes rolling back in his head. R waited for Jones to settle again. 

"Anytime you give me an answer I don't like, you are gonna get a taste of this fun little toy." R leaned down and pulled the gag from Jones mouth, but the man just stared at him sullenly. "Now , I want you to tell me everything that happened on the day my wife disappeared." 

"Look, mate," Killian pleaded, "I don't know anything, I swear! She never showed up for the interview that day!" Jones screamed shrilly as R pushed the device into the side of his neck, once again thrashing about spasmodically. R left the baton in contact longer this time, and when he removed it, Killian had passed out, blood leaking from his mouth where he had bitten his tongue. 

"Let the games begin," murmured R, looking smug.

*************** 

When he came to, Killian moaned and slowly opened his eyes. He was still tied, but his clothes had been removed. R stood over him with another kettle of water.

"If the subject is doused with liquid, it is said to increase the pain from this kind of torture." R explained conversationally. Then he dumped the boiling water on the naked man. 

Screaming again, Jones vision greyed, and he prayed he would pass out again. Unfortunately the demonic R once more stood over him with the damned rod. This time he lowered it to within an inch of the blistered and burnt mans' genitalia. Jones stammered desperately , "Wait! I'll tell you what happened, I'll tell you!" 

R grinned with malevolent glee and purred,"You surely will, dearie, you surely will." 

He lowered the rod to the crying mans' privates. He had all day, and he had a wide streak of cruelty, highly refined, as were all his vices. ***************** 

Belle was bored. She had walked in the gardens, with Dove trailing behind her. She gathered armfuls of the beautiful blooms and took them inside to arrange them. Dove went to the living room to watch a golf game, and now Belle was left alone, with nothing to do, and she was bored. She took one of her arrangements and placed it on the marble topped table in their foyer. She took one that was mainly roses and put it in her own room. With nothing else to do she decided to draw a bath and relax in the tub with a book. This particular book was about a man who had gone to war and come home to find his family gone. The man in the story was devastated and became strange and paranoid. Something about the tragic character resonated with Belle, reminded her of her own husband, and also, oddly, of the antiques dealer she had met in Storybrooke. She remembered his soft eyes, and the tingle of excitement she had felt when his hand touched hers. She remembered the sad story Jefferson had told her, how Gold had been abandoned as a child by his family and raised by an unloving foster family. No wonder his eyes looked so sad, so longing. Belle felt a strong desire to see the gentle soul again, but that desire made her feel uncomfortably guilty. She knew her own husband needed her. Oh but if he would just let her know him! He was so secretive. 

As Belle exited the tub and slipped into her robe, she decided that she was going to make a determined effort to know her husband, to show him she cared for him. Noticing how nice the flowers looked, Belle decided she would put them in R's room as a surprise, to show her affection and care. Picking up the flowers with a smile she entered the hall and then swung open the door to Rs rooms. She sat the flowers on a table, turning the arrangement so the prettiest side would show. Straightening up, her eye was caught by a dissonance in the pattern of the wallpaper. That was strange, it didn't appear to match up. Belle walked over to get a closer look, a low bluish light came through a hairline crack. Always curious, Belle began to pull.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A very pissed off R gets the truth  
> Belle makes a shocking discovery which changes everything
> 
> Please leave comments, I'd love to hear what you think


	16. Runaway

Belle eased open the hidden door to reveal a small room filled wth electronics. Most of it she didn't really recognize. A screen showed the backyard, another showed her own room, and they appeared to be showing events as they unfolded live. On one screen she observed Dove snoring away on the living room couch. There was even a live feed to her bathroom, she saw in squirming dismay. Belle hugged herself in a vain attempt at self comfort. The only room not covered appeared to be R's. Goosebumps broke out across her skin as she looked over the equipment. There was a chair in front of the screens. Belle seated herself, her hands shaking. There on a shelf were stacked dvds with dates on them. She picked up a case and glanced at it. It was dated last week. Belle placed it into the player with shaking hands, and saw her own image, sleeping in bed. 

My God, what is this? Why was R keeping surveillance on her, did he not trust her at all? This was creepy. Belle looked through the shelf of dvds, tears streaming down her face, he appeared to have kept watch on her from the first moment she had set foot in this house. She noticed a disc marked "Nott" and put it in. "Oh my God,"Belle murmured, horrified as she watched her husband beating a man with a baseball bat, Belle screamed as she watched him crack the mans skull with the bat, all the while smiling with satisfaction. She had always assumed the phrase, "her blood ran cold," was a literary metaphor. It wasn't. 

Belle couldn't breathe, she had to get out of this room. She ran to her own room, to the bathroom, retching miserably. After emptying the contents of her stomach, Belle slumped down onto the bed. She was shaking all over, nauseous, not knowing what to do. Crying, she wanted to reach out to someone for advice, for comfort or help, but realized that, aside from R she had no one. She had no friends, no family. No one, and oh my a God! Her husband appeared to be a spying, possessive, possibly cold blooded murderous maniac. Belle wrapped herself in her blankets and sobbed. Oh God, what if he had actually killed all those people on that plane? What if those gossiping people were telling the truth? No, she shook her head, trying to deny the horror, no, no. It couldn't be, she couldn't possibly be that blind. 

What was she going to do? He didn't allow her a credit card or money of her own. She had no one to call for help. How could she afford to leave? But how could she stay trapped here? In a panic, she opened her jewelry box and began stuffing the expensive gifts she'd acquired from R into a bag, maybe she could pawn them and use the money to start over somewhere. She frantically stuffed a suitcase with clothing and personal items. She ran back to R's room to search for loose cash, in his nightstand she found a roll of hundred dollar bills and a silver case full of pills. There was also a bag of white power. She pocketed the money and noticed a worn picture underneath. It was creased and obviously much handled, difficult to make out, but appeared to show R with his arm around a smiling petite raven haired woman. Just another mystery about the husband she was realizing she didn't know at all.

Belle hadn't felt so lost in years. Not since R had found her starving on the streets years ago. She was terrified to leave, terrified to stay. She couldn't stay, she couldn't think straight, just knew she had to get away. Quiet as a mouse she crept down the stairs with her bags. Peeking into the the living room she saw Dove sleeping on the couch, the TV blaring some orange colored maniac with weird hair. She left the bags by the door and tiptoed forward. R stored the car keys in the kitchen on a board labeled with each make and model. She would have to sneak through the living room past Dove to retrieve the keys.Belle didn't know if she could do it.

Sweating, taking a deep breath, Belle removed her shoes and crept as silently as possible through the shadowy room. Luckily the ranting man on the Telly was making enough noise to cover her panicked panting breaths. She slipped past the sleeping Dove as carefully as possible. He didn't move as she snuck past and Belle breathed a sigh of relief as she reached the dark kitchen. She didn't want to risk turning on the light so she tiptoed in her stockinged feet over to where she knew the pegboard with the keys was located next to a large brushed chrome refrigerator. It was too damn dark to read the labels, but she knew she was too nervous to drive a stick that night. She needed to see which car was an automatic. Slowly, slowly, Belle opened the refrigerator door, allowing a small amount of light out.

There! That was it ! She grabbed the key, so careful not to make any noise, and gently shut the refrigerator door. Now all she had to do was get out of the house without being stopped.Belle knew the alarm panel was located in the kitchen also, and softly moved over to see if it was engaged. The light was red, meaning Dove hadn't reset it after their walk in the garden. Belle would be able to exit without setting off an alarm. Tears slid silently down her pale face as she contemplated what she was about to do. To leave this man she'd truly believed she'd loved, her heart was breaking with the reality that she really knew him not at all. It felt as if the whole planet were tilting crookedly, off balance, and wrong. Like the rug of the reality of existence had rudely been pulled out from under her. Belle pressed a fist tightly to her mouth to stifle her horrified sobs.

For a while she crouched on the kitchen floor and wept for her life, gone so very wrong, her love, gone so very wrong. How had she come to this? The pain was overwhelming. At last, a niggling fear for her life began to seep in. She didn't know what R would do to her if he found out what she had discovered-- but that was just it, wasn't it? She couldn't predict anything he might do.

*********** "Are you ready to have that conversation now, dearie?" R danced lightly around the broken and bleeding man on the stained concrete floor. 

Killian mumbled and spat blood.

"What?" R leaned down, put his hand behind his ear, "can't quite hear you!" He slapped Jones. "I asked, are you ready?" 

"Yes!" Jones gasped. He spat out more blood. " I'll tell you, and I'll enjoy hurting you with the truth of it!" 

R grasped his hands together, twisting tightly, here at last was the truth. He had to know it, needed to know it, but could he live with it? 


	17. Empty Spaces

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is a flashback to the week before R found Belle homeless in the city, awhile after Isabel's disappearance

R was sleeping fitfully, the moonlight pouring through his window illuminating the sheen of sweat on his forehead, and the tears slipping from beneath his long lashes as he dreamed.

 

R was four, playing in the dirt front yard of his family's small house. The sun beat down on him and the back of his neck itched and burned as he pretended some broken sticks were cowboys and Indians. His tiny thin legs were covered in long scratches, and he had a large yellowish mark on his babyish right cheek, a fading bruise. A cigarette burn mark festered with pus on the back of one soft hand. He heard a door slam as someone came out of the house, but he continued to look intently at his sticks, moving them about in a tiny mock battle.  
"You are ruining my life," said his mama's cold voice.  
"How, mama?" Maybe he could fix it.  
"By being here."

The dream then changed and he was five years old. His parents had abandoned him. His brother had been crippled. He was dragging his broken brother through the woods. His brother was crying, in pain, begging him to stop.  
R felt terrible , but knew they had to find help or they would die out here. He forced himself to sound cold,"Don't be a baby. We'll find help soon." He had to be strong, he wouldn't let anything else happen to his twin. Already he had given his twin all of the meager bit of berries he'd found.He was starving, exhausted, and terrified. He was also determined to save his twin, even if meant pretending he didn't care about his brother's pain, or his own.

The dreamscape wavered again, this time he was twelve, in one of the many group homes he was forced into over the years. He didn't know what had become of his brother, and could hardly remember him. He'd left R years ago, been adopted, left his brother to endure alone. R was hiding under his covers, but knew it wouldn't do any good. It never did. He was small and powerless and had no control over what happened to him. Suddenly his room flooded with light as the overhead bulb was switched on. He'd known this was coming when he dropped and broken a plate after dinner.  
"Come on outta there you little bastard. Bad boys who don't show respect have learn it. Come out now and be a man."  
The woman pulled the covers off him and slapped him, hard. He whimpered as she pulled down his pajama pants. "Time to take your lesson , learn to be a man," she began to fondle his privates as he tried to shut down his mind. He could turn off his consciousness, he had discovered, and endure this. "Bad boy, you have no respect. You ugly little bastard, no one is ever going to love you." She laughed as she continued to abuse his little body. It seemed to go on forever. 

R woke up, still crying. He sat up, pulling his knees up to his chest, and sobbed like a broken-hearted child. He cried until he was wrung out, feeling hot shame flush his face. He sat there alone in the darkness for awhile. He felt the emptiness of his life crushing him once again, the cold emptiness of his life, his home, his soul. There was something essential missing from him, he knew, something he didn't understand, that he needed desperately. He had begun to see it when he had Isobel, had almost figured it out, almost grasped it. But she had left him, was gone, never coming back. His chance of a normal life gone with her. He let the emptiness wash over him, and when he could take it no more, he let the cold black darkness come in to fill the empty space.


	18. Epiphany

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> An epiphany is an overwhelming experience of sudden realization

Finally Belle stood up from crouching on the floor. She was almost frozen in fear, but knew if she didn't make her move now she might not have another chance. She screwed up her courage and stood up, then froze again as the phone in the living room began to ring. She held her breath as she heard Dove stir in the living room. The phone rang a couple more times before the sleepy giant answered it. She listened quietly and heard him say, "Yea boss. Yep all quiet here. She walked in the gardens and she's been in her room since then. Yep. See ya soon." She heard the phone being replaced and then Dove yawned hugely as he left the living room.

Oh God, R was on his way home! Belle ran to hang up the keys exactly where they had been before. If anything at all was out of place he would surely notice. Then she remembered! The flowers in his room! She couldn't let him know she had been in his room! Panic made her vision grey out for a moment. She ran out of the kitchen and hurriedly climbed the stairs, running into Dove coming down. 

"Miss Isobel, you should be in your room. Your husband is on his way home, he won't like you wandering around so late."

Belles heart was hammering in her chest and she desperately hoped she didn't look as guilty as she felt. "I was having trouble dozing off, so I went for some warm milk. I think I'll sleep fine now. Good night." She hurried off toward her room. Going around a bend in the hall she waited, hidden, until Dove's footsteps faded away down the stairs. Panicky, she ran to R's room and slipped the roll of money out of her pocket and back into his drawer. She grabbed the vase of flowers and rushed back to her own room. After changing into a silk nightgown and hiding her suitcase under her bed, she slipped under her sheets and lay there petrified. She didn't think R would notice anything amiss, she'd put everything to rights. Still she was nervous. She couldn't sleep for a long time though eventually the anxiety wore her down and she slipped into unconsciousness.

*****************  
R was speeding up the dark highway toward home. He'd left a horribly beaten Jones chained to a pole in the warehouse. In the end his own cowardice prevented him getting his answers, and instead of asking questions he'd simply beaten Killian to a pulp. He just couldn't face reality. Tomorrow night, he promised himself. Right now he needed so badly to see Isobel. His hands white knuckled on the steering wheel, he pushed the gas pedal flat to the floor. He needed to release the horrible tension built up in his body, the mocking words in his brain, the torment in his soul. Unwanted thoughts were swirling in his head, thoughts about the first Isobel. What did that mean, the "first". He was feeling confused, the two women blending together and then becoming separated in his mind. R felt his hold on reality, always precarious, was slipping away even more, the unsuccessful session with Jones having brought back all sorts of half forgotten, long buried truths.He banged on the steering wheel, trying to hold onto his sanity long enough to get home to Isobel. Once there, he would have some drinks, do a couple of lines, and then fuck her brutally until he found sweet oblivion again. It would be ok, he told himself, he just needed to exorcise this rage and confusion, he would work it all out and everything would be fine, fine, fine. He chanted it aloud in a whisper, his hands curling around the wheel as if he could choke the life out of it. ********************* Belle was still dozing uneasily when she was woken by a noise. She realized it was the sound of the heavy front door downstairs opening and then slamming shut. She gasped in fear and brought the sheets up around her neck as she broke out in a cold sweat. R was home, and by the sound of it, in a very bad mood. Belle trembled helplessly, would he notice anything amiss? She thought nervously of the packed suitcase under her bed, then shook as she tried to remember if she had put everything back in its place in the surveillance room. In her fear, she couldn't remember. She heard voices downstairs and knew R was speaking to his associate, Dove. Would the big man mention her trip to the kitchen? Oh God, what had she been thinking? She whimpered to herself. Belle had never been so terrified in her life. Heavy footsteps pounded on the staircase. The sounds stopped outside her bedroom door. Belle held her breath for long agonizing minutes as nothing more happened. Then finally, the footsteps continued as her husband continued down the hall toward his own room.

R stopped outside Isobel's room for a few moments. He needed to see her, desperately, but didn't want to barge in all crazy and wild eyed. He realized he needed a few moments to compose himself, so he returned to his own room. Once there, he poured himself a drink and sat down heavily on his bed. He hung his head in his hands, thoughts spinning crazily in his head. Opening the bedside drawer, he removed the plastic baggie of cocaine and a hundred dollar bill. He tapped out some of the white powder and, using a credit card to cut it up, he rolled up the bill in preparation for sniffing the coke. As he was leaning over, he spied something in the drawer. A picture. Dropping the bill, he picked up the picture of himself and Isobelle. He sat there staring at the picture for a long time, unmoving. At last, suddenly, he grabbed the bag of cocaine and stalked into his large bathroom. He stomped over to the toilet and upended the bag over it, dumping the entire contents and then flushing. Clutching the old photograph,he stalked out of his room, down the hall, and stopped once more outside of Isobel's door. He felt a momentous weight hovering over him, a sense of a tidal wave about to break over him. Wether it would drown him or not he didn't know. Something was teetering in his mind.

Quietly, carefully, he eased open the door. Softly, R tiptoed, feather light, to stand at the foot of her bed and gaze at her. She was so beautiful, so young and innocent. A wall began to crumble somewhere deep in his mind. She looked so small. She looked...she looked...she looked like a homeless child, curled up under the covers, afraid and at the mercy of a monster. Just as he himself had been.

The wall in his mind which kept out old thoughts began to tumble down faster, long held fortifications cracking open. Memories came pouring out. Memories of all the little cruelties he had inflicted on her, his Isobel. All the little pinches and shoves, the mind games and nasty little remarks. The sarcastic put downs, the sexual games to unbalance her. The constant need to dominate and keep her down. The way he forced her to dye her hair, to dress a certain way. The rage he sometimes felt towards poor Isobel...because, because...because she WASN'T Isobel. It hit him like a blow to the solar plexus. He didn't even know this girl, only who he had forced her to become. The wall crumbled apart completely. R sank to the floor, his legs giving out. What had he done? This poor child, this poor girl. Oh lord, what had he done? He rubbed his fingers anxiously over the old photo, appalled at himself, shaking.

R began to weep silently, his shoulders shaking. He whispered, "I'm sorry. You didn't deserve any of this. I'm so sorry."

Under the covers, Belle heard him weeping, and her soft heart couldn't take it. "R," she called softly, "what is it?"

R startled. "Oh sweetheart, I didn't mean to wake you." He rose from the floor and walked over to sit nervously on the bed. "I've just realized how badly I've treated you. For so long.There are no words to tell you how sorry I am." His head hung down, his face hiding behind a curtain of hair, too ashamed to look at her. "I know I've said this before, and of course you don't believe me. Why should you? I'm a truly terrible man."

Belle saw a tear fall from his hidden face to land on her outstretched hand. She lifted her hand to his face and brushed back his soft hair, laying her palm on his cheek, and his eyes fluttered shut.

"My darling Belle, I would do anything to make it up to you." His eyes pleaded with her, and they were so dark, so sad. 

"Do you mean it this time? Or are you just going to go back to your old ways?" Belle watched his eyes, large and liquid and shattered. Golden flecks and pain lived there. 

"I do mean it precious. I'll take you on a trip, anywhere you want to go. We'll travel the world, see all the most beautiful places. I'll never be such a bastard again, I promise you!" His velvety voice begged and cajoled. 

"All I want is my freedom. I want to come and go as I please, I want to go where I want, without constant questions or being made to feel it's wrong. I want to have friends. I want to never be locked in again. Can you promise me that? That I'll be free?"

R looked at her, but his eyes slid away. "Of course, of course! Anything you want, anything!" But he would not meet her gaze. His hands writhed miserably over one another. 

Belle knew he was lying. She thought about the surveillance room and what she had seen. She thought about the plane accident that had so benefited him. She shivered. Nothing had changed, but she had to play along. She took his hand and said simply," Thank you."

R wanted to hold her, but he would not subject her to his foulness. Instead he whispered, "Good night, and you'll see, everything is going to be different." He stood up, gave her a small crooked grin, a little shaky, and left her room, shutting the door behind him softly.

Once again he stood there for a while, hands fluttering around his pockets. He put two long fingers in his right pocket and drew out a key. He would be gone tomorrow to the warehouse, he wanted to know she was safe. He looked at the lock. Finally, he sighed, turned away, and put the key back in his pocket, leaving her to her freedom.

Belle, having listened to him lingering outside her door in the dark, sighed with relief. As she was once more drifting off she realized something with a start. For the first time ever, R had called her Belle.


	19. One More Nail In The Coffin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long. There's a lot happening here.

Belle woke up so early that her room still had the shine of moonlight in it. It was time to get going, but she was so tired. Tossing and turning in fear all night had not left her rested, and she slept again. When next she woke sunlight filled the room. Gasping, she roused herself out of bed and tiptoed to her door, holding her breath. There was no point in trying to escape if her door was locked. Terrified, she slowly tried the knob, praying silently, and gasped to find out it turned. Maybe he had forgotten to lock her in last night, or maybe he had taken temporary pity on her. She didn't know, but she did know she needed to take advantage of the situation quickly. Before it changed. She ran into her bathroom, splashing water on her face, tying her hair back. Rushing to her closet she quickly dragged on a pair of jeans and a sweatshirt. Jamming her feet into a pair of tennis shoes, she then leaned down and grabbed her packed suitcase from under her bed.

It was time to go. She briefly thought about the cash in R's bedside drawer, but decided she wouldn't steal from him, she would break it off clean. Belle crept down the stairs holding her breath, through the empty living room, through the kitchen.Entering the expansive garage, Belle tried to decide which expensive car to take. She soon realized she couldn't take any of them. It wa quite likely they all had a tracking device implanted on them. Also, she couldn't risk the noise of the garage door.. Frightening as it was, she would have to start over on her own. Slowly she tiptoed back through the foyer, and out the front door for the last time. 

In a short time Belle was on the road, hurrying away from the manor and the life of the man that she had mistakenly thought had saved her from pain and isolation. Rolling her bag along behind her, Belle hurried up the road, terrified that at any minute R would catch her. She wished she had left earlier, but with no alarm clock she had slept later than she wished to.

Soon Belle heard a car approaching from behind, and her heart leapt into her throat. Heart pounding,she turned around to look, it was a battered yellow bug, not one of R's gleaming prizes. The car slowed and pulled over next to her.

The car's window rolled down and an attractive young blonde stuck her head out."Hey, you look like you could use some help. You wanna ride?" 

"Oh, please, thank you!" Belle felt relief wash over her. Maybe she would make it after all. She hurried around to the passengers' side and pulled her small suitcase in after her. 

"So where you headed?" The blonde looked at her like she knew what was going on, but didn't ask.

"Storybrooke," said Belle decisively, slamming the dented door. 

**********************

R had almost reached the warehouse. He'd left early that morning, before Belle woke. He'd decided after a miserable tearful night of regret that things would have to change, that he would have to change. The guilt and shame of what he had done to Belle weighed on him like the weight of the universe itself. At the same time the loss of Isobel felt like it was shattering his soul all over again. For now, all he could do was keep moving forward, and try not to think. He had a task to do, a wrong to right. Maybe, maybe he could still save himself. 

He pulled up to the warehouse and parked the car crookedly. His hands shook and fluttered as he walked toward the building and unlocked the door with some difficulty. Slumping into the large room, he saw that Jones was conscious and glaring at him with hatred. R went over to the nearby table and poured a glass of water from a pitcher placed there. His hands shook so violently that he spilled some on the floor. Without a word he stalked over to the prisoner and held it to his lips. Jones clamped his lips together and turned his head.

R laughed bitterly,"It's not poisoned, dearie, but suit yourself." He then withdrew a key with his long fingers and walked around behind Jones. A second later the chains fell and he reappeared in front of Killian. Using a knife he cut the ropes binding Jones' wrists.

"Go," he said simply, pointing toward the exit. 

"What," Jones said stupidly. 

"I'm letting you go. I'm done with this. Anything you could say doesn't matter anymore, she never loved me." 

R stood with his hands clasped together around the knife to hide their shaking, head bowed and teeth ground together in overwhelming grief.

Jones rubbed his wrists and arms, getting the circulation back. He carefully stood up and stretched his limbs, testing his strength. Looking at his enemy with hatred he then glanced toward the door and eased himself carefully past R, ready to run if need be. He didn't know what had changed, but his nemesis looked broken, shattered even. Jones couldn't resist rubbing salt in whatever wound was torturing the man.

"She did love you, you know."

R looked up at him from under a curtain of hair, pain plain to see in his eyes, and Jones smirked. "She came to interview me that day. She looked beautiful, so beautiful that I couldn't resist her."

R's eyes began to show fury, and Killian laughed maliciously, ready to twist the knife.

"Oh no, you needn't be jealous, she didn't want me. As I said she loved you. She always loved you."

"B but," stammered R, "then what...?"

Jones laughed again, enjoying the man's pain and confusion. "That's the good part. I decided to have her anyway, drove her out to the middle of nowhere." He watched with glee as the tension mounted on R's desperate face. "Unfortunately she put up a fight. I shot her." He laughed as all the blood drained from his enemy's face and the man staggered.

"I shot the bitch and left her to die on the road like a pile of garbage! Left her bleeding all over the road like a stuck pig!" He gloated as he watched realization, terrible pain, loneliness and despair wash over R's expressive face. Jones had his triumph at last, and he was loving it. "She's never coming back, you asshole, and she loved you! She actually loved you!"

Jones was laughing so hard that he missed the lightning fast motion as R leapt forward, screaming anguish, and raising the knife, slit Jones' throat open from ear to ear.

Blood pouring out from the gaping wound, Jones slumped forward and fell dead to the concrete floor. R was able to feel nothing, no triumph, no grief, absolutely nothing. It was if his heart had been turned to ice. Robotically he went over to the worktable and picked up a can with a spout attached. He jerkily walked around the room and splashed gasoline around its borders. Returning to the body of Jones, flat eyed, he poured the remaining gas over the corpse. Still without expression he withdrew a matchbook from his pocket, lit a match, and tossed it onto the body. With a whoosh the flames caught and grew, a smell of cooking meat rolling out nauseatingly. R turned and walked out of the building without a backward glance. There would be no saving himself.

*******************

Belle could feel the blonde woman glancing sideways at her , curiously. The woman finally said, "I'm Emma. I don't usually pull over for hitchhikers"

"I really appreciate it," said Belle nervously. "I'll pay you back somehow."

"Don't worry about it, you look like you you could use a little luck on your side."

Belle said under her breath," You have no idea."

Emma was quiet for awhile and then said gently, " I'm a pretty good judge of character, and I also have a long experience of running away. If I had to guess, I'd say you're a decent person who's trying to escape something."

Belle wondered how much she could tell this stranger. She was wary, but she also desperately needed someone to confide in, and Emma seemed sympathetic.

The wind through the open windows blew through the car, whipping the womens' long hair around. Every mile that went by helped Belle to feel safer. Finally she admitted, " I'm trying to get away from my husband. He.. he's c-controlling" she managed. "He has a bad temper."

Emma looked angry,"Figured it was something like that. It usually is."

"He's not a bad man," Belle rushed to say," he's just very troubled."

Emma looked extremely skeptical, but didn't say anything.

"Anyway, I've been to Storybrooke before, and thought I could stay there awhile" Belle finished rather lamely.

Emma was quiet for a time, thinking. "Do you have any money? A place to stay?"

Belle admitted,"No, not really. I had to leave in kind of a hurry, and I'm scared he'll find me. Oh, I don't know what to do! The only thing of value I have is my jewelry." Belle started to cry. 

This story was familiar to Emma, having been through it herself. Growing up in group homes, she had run away several times. Emma knew of someone who might be able to help, but she didn't want this woman to go from the frying pan to the fire. 

Belle sobbed, her breath hitching as she struggled to get her emotions under control. 

Finally Emma said reluctantly,"I think I know someone who can help you. He can give you money for your jewelry, lease you a place to stay. Also, nobody is going to hurt you if you're under his protection. Just keep your emotional distance. He's ... not friendly. But he owes me."

"Thank you, thank you so much," gasped Belle. They passed the sign she had seen before, "Welcome to Storeybrook" and once again she had that odd feeling of importance, of coming home.

They drove into town and down main street. Belle felt excited for some reason she couldn't name when Emma parked in front of a familiar pawnshop.

"This is the guy I told you about. I think I'll be able to get him to help you. Don't let his attitude scare you off."

"No," Belle breathed, "I've met him before. He's very nice."

Emma glanced at Belle like she'd lost her mind. "Ooookay. Come on." They entered the store.

**********************

Gold heard the bell over the front door ring and came out of the back room. He really wasn't in any mood to deal with any of the tiresome townsfolk today. He looked up to see Emma Swan, and started to say, grumpily,"Miss Swan, what can I..." His voice failed him as he noticed who was with her. Belle. He hadn't been able to get the beauty out of his mind since she'd left.His hands clutched the handle of his cane convulsively. He'd thought to never see her again, yet here she was, in his shop. He couldn't speak. His breath was short, and his heart stuttered in his chest.

Emma couldn't figure out what was going on. She was just opening her mouth to demand her favor from Gold when Belle burst out,"Mr. Gold! I'm in trouble, please I need your help!"

Emma watched in shock as Gold limped over to Belle and gripped her shoulder with one hand as if checking to see if she was real. "Of course I'll help you!" He said, voice full of emotion.

"Well," thought Emma,"will wonders never cease."

************************

R stood in front of the burning warehouse, watching impassively, smoking a last cigarette. The heat from the burning building illuminated his face and blew back his hair. Finally he dropped the cigarette butt on the ground and pulled out the bloody knife he'd used to kill Jones. He lifted the knife slowly, resting its sharp edge against his own throat. Time to get this over with. Time to end this worthless life. He didn't feel sorry for himself, but he did feel regret.

His cell phone rang just then, startling him. He started to ignore it, but pulled it out and looked at the number. It was Dove. R punched a button," What is it man, I'm busy." That was an understatement.

"Sir," Dove started nervously," something has happened."

"Well, tell me, Dove. I've things to do."

"Sir, I don't know how to tell you this, but your wife is missing. When she didn't come out of her room today I went to check on her. She's gone."

Overwhelmed by a horrible sense of deja vu, R dropped the knife. The blood drained from his head so quickly that he almost passed out. Not again, oh God not again. He had entered a nightmare. Gripping the phone so hard it cracked, he struggled to speak. Finally he ground out, "Find her. Find her now or you're a dead man."

*******************

Dove hung up the phone. He knew his employer well enough to know his last statement was no idle threat. He would find the woman. First thing to do was check the video records. Dove lumbered up the stairs and entered the secret room in his employer's room. He brought the video back to early that morning and saw on the tape the wife pulling a suitcase from under her bed and leaving her room. Switching to the recording from the foyer camera he observed her leaving through the front door. Dove then brought up the street view and saw her trudging down the road, pulling her bag behind her.

Watching the street video a while longer, he stopped the video when a yellow car appeared on the screen. Manipulating the image, Dove zoomed in on the liscence plate, he wrote down the numbers. After a quick call, Dove left the room. Stopping in the kitchen for car keys, he entered the garage. Dove chose a fast car, buckled in, and headed for Storybrook.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, God, R, I'm so sorry baby.


	20. Almost Gone

Gold couldn't believe his luck, he had been dreaming of this woman since he last saw her. His soulful amber eyes drank in every detail of her - her petite form, her lovely face, and her shining chestnut hair. He had to get himself under control before he made a fool of himself. He didn't even know this girl. She surely wouldn't appreciate an old lame bastard like him staring at her!

Belle for her part couldn't take her eyes off the man who appeared to be a kinder, more self contained doppelgänger of her own husband. She seemed to feel warmth through her shirt where his hand gripped her shoulder gently. She blushed and gazed into his eyes.

Emma, uncomfortable at this odd display, cleared her throat, and the two sprang apart. "Um, well, I guess I'll be going. Thanks for your help, Gold. Belle, if you need anything let me know." Emma hurried through the door thinking, That was really weird.

"What's happened?" Gold asked, concern obvious on his face. He wanted to help this woman, for some reason, felt he had to protect her. "Tell me, sweetheart, I can help you." He tugged on her hand gently, leading her to the back room. "Here, sit." He pointed to a narrow bed. "I'll make you some thing to drink."

Belle watched him as he fussed with a tea kettle. She still couldn't get over how exactly he looked like her husband.As she observed him, however, she began to notice tiny differences. Not just the limp, but the entire way he moved was different from R. Where R's movements were light and quick, always seeming about to fly out of control, Gold was deliberate, smooth, like a performer on stage. He displayed none of R's manic energy, yet they both possessed that same liquid grace. Golds hands didn't flutter about like birds, either, but were rather almost languid. His manner made Belle feel peaceful rather than on edge, and she relaxed a little.

Gold brought her a cup of tea, and then, because he could carry only one at a time due to the cane, limped back over to fetch his own. At last he settled next to her and gazed at her with his gentle brown eyes. "Now dear, tell me what is the matter, and what you are running from. I promise I will do all in my power to help you."

His genuine kindness caused Belle to feel slightly unbalanced. There was no teasing in his tone, no mockery. He didn't seem to be seeking anything from her either, neither validation or reassurance. He was simply and plainly concerned. It was slightly odd, as this sincere and very simple emotion was not something Belle was used to. With R there were always several meanings to any interaction. Belle took a sip of her tea as she tried to calm her nerves and pull herself together. Gold sat gazing at her patiently, not pressuring her in any way. Eventually he tentatively reached out a hand and laid it overtop hers, and that caring gesture seemed to open the emotional floodgate for Belle.

Belle put down her teacup and held her head in her hands as she began to sob. She just couldn't be strong one minute longer, and all her pent up sorrow and confusion came pouring out. Gold moved closer and laid an arm around her shoulder as he stroked her hair and murmured comforting sounds. 

Belle wept on his shoulder, slowly becoming aware of the warmth radiating off his body. She felt his breath on her neck as he whispered soothing nonsense in her ear, felt his strong arm around her, and his gentle hand in her hair. She felt a heat low in her belly, spreading up to cause her face to flush. Oh no, why was she having this completely inappropriate response to his innocent efforts to comfort her. Belle quickly pulled away, embarrassed. 

Gold was startled at her abrupt drawing away, and felt he had certainly overstepped her boundaries. "I'm sorry," he apologized at once. "Here," he pulled out a handkerchief and handed it to the soggy woman. He thought she looked beautiful with the teardrops trembling like crystals on her long lashes, and her eyes were the most amazing shade of blue. Stop it, he ordered himself, your ridiculous fantasies are the last thing this poor woman needs right now. 

"Are you ready to talk?" Gold asked softly. "If not, take your time, there's no hurry at all." He wouldn't pressure her, but he desperately wanted to know what had her so miserable, and just as desperately wanted to fix it. 

"I'm ready," Belle said, sniffling. "You've been so kind to me.Thank you." And this time she put her hand on his. She looked into his warm amber eyes, so open and kind, and she told him everything. 

**************************

R paced the floor of the destroyed and dark living room, glass crunching under the soles of his expensive loafers. After hearing from Dove he had sped all the way home, dangerously unable to see with the tears of fear and frustration clouding his vision. When he arrived in the mansion and Dove still hadn't called, he lost all control. Without bothering to turn on the lights he began smashing and throwing everything he could reach. Now that there was nothing left to break he was reduced to pacing back and forth, his rage and fear crawling over his body like biting ants, tormenting him.

It was as if he were being forced to relive that horrible day that Isobel, the love of his life, had disappeared, and it was making him crazed. He howled his frustration and stalked into the kitchen, where he began systematically smashing everything breakable in that room. It was unbearable! He needed to know what happened to her! If he could just know that she was safe, that was all he needed. He stopped his rampage and hung his head, his curtain of hair swinging slightly from his heaving breaths. If she would just turn out to be all right, if she had gone on purpose, he would let her go. He would let her go to live whatever life she wanted. Once he made sure she was safe and happy, he would set her free and then he would finish what he had started in the warehouse parking lot. Belle would be happy and he would at last be free from all this overwhelming pain.

*************************

Gold held Belle carefully. She was exhausted after telling him her story and felt like she could sleep for days. Gold looked at her and easily read the the look on her face. "Come on, you're going to stay at my house tonight. I have plenty of rooms, and you're far too worn out to worry about any of that now." 

Belle really was wrung out, emotionally and physically, and she felt she could trust this man, though she barely knew him. "Ok, just for tonight. I really can't thank you enough for all this. I'm so sorry to come here, someone you hardly know, and lay all my problems at your door." 

"Nonsense dear, I've hardly been the best of men in my life. Perhaps this will earn me some good karma." 

Belle didn't believe him for a minute. She knew he was a good man, only doing this without some payoff in mind. 

"There we are, " announced Gold with a shy smile. "Come, my dear." He led her with a comfortable hand on her lower back, making her feel safe. "My car is right over here." He opened the passenger side door for Belle and waited until she was comfortably seated before shutting the door. Opening the back door he settled her luggage into the back seat, and then limped over to the drivers side and slid in, placing his cane between them. "When we get to the house I'll fix us a little something to eat. Things always seem a bit better on a full stomach." He turned his gentle smile on her again, and Belle sighed. She was feeling safer and better already.

They rode in companionable silence for awhile, Belle studying Gold out of the corner of her eye. She hadn't mentioned to him the almost perfect resemblance he bore to her husband, feeling that was a complication she just wasn't able to get into yet. Also, she was a bit airhead might think her delusional. The resemblance was staggering, although He wasn't a perfect copy of R. Besisides the limp and the more languid mannerisms, he was a bit heavier, a bit more solid looking. His hair was shorter, and he lacked the aura of menace that R had. All in all, Belle decided, he was a thoroughly attractive and kind man, and she would have to keep a tight reign on her emotions around him. The very last thing she needed was to get involved with someone else. It was time she learned to live with herself. 

Gold was gripping the steering wheel a little tighter than necessary. Belle's story had upset him, and he didn't know what to do about it. It wasn't his place to interfere in a couple's marriage, but he wanted to help her. He would let her stay the night (and didn't know how he would manage to sleep knowing she was right there, under the same roof) and then tomorrow he would help her get set up on her own. Then he was determined he would leave her alone, until and if she decided on her own that her marriage was over. Perhaps then... no he was being ridiculous, she would never have any interest in someone like him. She was young, gorgeous, and vibrant. And by her own account her husband was wealthy, successful, and wildly attractive. He shook his head. Best to get such far fetched ideas out of his head now. He had been alone all his life and he was used to it. Getting his hopes up now would only lead to heartbreak.

******************** 

Dove swore bitterly to himself as he heard the steady thump, thump, thump of a flat tire. He pulled to the side of the country highway and got out of the car. Sure enough the right rear tire was flat. It was already getting late and by the time he got the tire changed and made it to Storybrooke, it would be too late to look for his employers wife. He pulled out his cell phone to call the man, and he dreaded the conversation. His boss was going to be very unhappy. Dove knew his boss was volatile and dangerous, but he was utterly loyal to the man. R had saved his life many many years ago, given him a place to stay, and a means to make a good living. Dove knew if he hadn't left the life of a mercenary soldier when he did that he would by now be dead either in body or soul. So while he didn't relish the upcoming confrontation, he would never betray his employer. The man had treated him with compassion when the whole world saw Dove as nothing more than a monster. To Dove, flawed as his boss might be, he was family. 

The huge man punched in the number, his hand trembling somewhat. After only one ring the phone at the other end was snatched up. 

"Have you found her?" R asked breathlessly, his voice shaking. 

"I'm so sorry, boss, there's been a little problem. One of the tires blew out. I have a spare and I'll fix it right away, but it'll be nighttime by the time I reach her. I know where she is however, and I believe she's safe." 

"What? How do you know that? If anything happens to her, anything at all, I'll kill you myself." R's voice was quiet and deadly, he meant every word. 

"Don't worry, boss," Dove reassured him,"I know how important this is to you. I swear I will not allow any harm to come to her." 

R's voice trembled when he asked,"Where did she go? Did someone take her? What the hell is going on?" He was still caught in the nightmare of the past, and his treacherous mind kept conjuring up all sorts of horrific scenerios. His hands were bleeding from his earlier tantrum, and the blood flew off them as they fluttered out of control. He hadn't noticed he had clawed bloody furrows in his scalp in his despair. The darkness was washing over him again, just like before. 

"I think if you'll watch the surveillance tapes, you'll feel better," Dove soothed. "She wasn't in danger, she left on her own. Take a look." 

While somewhat relieved for Belle, R felt his heart skip a beat and he staggered. For a second his vision turned black and he struggled to remain upright. Of course, of course she had left him. He was nothing but a monster, after all. He had been foolish to think anyone could ever love him. Isobel was gone, now Belle had left him. The pain washed over him and he felt he might die of grief on the spot. 

"No matter," R snapped. "Just get going and let me know if she's safe." 

Dove frowned after his employer disconnected. The man might seem cold to others, but Dove knew that his boss was actually a creature ruled by love and longing, and he was determined to help him in any way he could.He remained calm, planning his next move as he opened the boot and took out the car jack. Methodically he lifted the car with the jack, loosened the lug nuts, and removed the flat tire. Whistling tunelessly, he removed the spare tire from the boot and effortlessly carried it over and lifted it in place. He felt calmed as he tightened the nuts and got the tire on securely. He was acting, moving forward, these things comforted Dove. He always felt better with a plan of action, and his employer gave him that. He was also grateful that he rarely had to act violently since being employed by R. He had been afforded a safe, stable, and fairly predictable life. ThT was exactly what Dove needed after the the people who had used him for so long as nothing more than a killing machine. He knew his boss wasn't an innocent man, but at least he was a man who usually did his own killing. For that Dove was grateful, he didn't have the stomach for it any more. He suspected his boss knew this and tried to spare him.

Dove finished up with the tire, climbed back in the car, headed toward Storybrooke. He was ready and willing to do whatever it took to help the man who had saved him. 

**************************

R put down the phone. He sank to the floor. For a long time he just stared blankly at the Aubusson carpet covered in shards of glass. He didn't think, didn't feel, he supposed he was in shock. His mind flailed around for an answer, but none of his usual cures would work, no alcohol, no cocaine. There was no fix for this, there was nothing, nothing he could do. So he sat in the broken glass, in the broken despair of a life that had known nothing but despair. He should have known, HAD known if the truth be told. That's why he had been so possessive, so paranoid. He had always known no one would ever love him. Every day he was forced to watch other people have what he would never have. He saw them hold hands, give a peck on the cheeck, discuss what they would have for dinner, live normal, loving lives. Have family. Have belonging. These are simple things every human but he was entitled to. Since the moment he was born he was unwanted, he couldn't even stand himself. 

"It's fine," he spoke to himself out loud. "It's fine. I'll just make sure she's ok, and then I'll get it over with. But I owe it to her to make sure she's safe." There was one thing that could help him, one way he had learned to express his emotions without disaster, he picked himself up. Dusting the shards and debris off his lithe and graceful body, he headed to the one major piece of furniture he had not destroyed. How Isobel had loved to listen to him play, to improvise the impossible music that had come from his soul in her prescence. He sat on the bench, his long fingers ghosting over the keys, tinkling music barely making a sound. He remembered Isobel, rising frm their bed in the morning, hair mussed, eyes bright, laughing mouth teasing him as he rushed toward her. He always used to wake up earlier than her, but would happily jump back in bed to cuddle, giggle, and tease. Then after he had satisfied her ( usually many times!) he would skip Down to the kitchen to cook a few waffles, pancakes, or whatever, bringing them up with champagne and orange juice and afterward they would make slow leisurely love again.

R lost himself in thunderous piano music, playing out his pain, his misery, his black shrunken soul. The notes of agony rose to the ceiling, passed through, rose to heaven. A desperate lonely prayer that would forever remain unanswered. 

Lost in his heartbreaking nostalgia, R finally passed out from the soul wearying pain. People like this don't get happy endings, much less the least understanding.

********************* 

At the pink house in the small town, everyone slept. At the modern mansion in the city, that broken soul slept. Only Dove, a strong, gentle man at heart.sped down a lonely country highway, trying to redeem himself in the eyes of the one soul who already accepted him.

********************** 

R woke, alone in his big bed. He looked toward the sun streaming into the window and closed his eyes, but it was no use. He could not stop the day from coming. He picked up the half empty whiskey glass on his nightstand and downed what was left.Slowly he did what he needed to do to face the day. This day was it, this day would decide everything.

The phone rang and R snapped it up immediately. "Yes? " 

"Boss, I found her."

"Well, bring her back," R clutched the phone desperately. 

"I can't," Dove didn't want to say this, he dreaded to say this. " She's with someone. A man." 

"Kill him," R choked out.


	21. Revelation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> BOOM

"Kill him."

"Boss, " said Dove anxiously, "I don't mean to argue with you, but I don't think that's a good idea. The situation is... well... I think you had better come and see for yourself."

R was impatient, "Very well, Dove, if you're not up to the job, I'll do it myself!" Furious, R slammed down the phone and stalked into his study. From his gleaming desk he withdrew a dangerous looking automatic pistol. He checked to make sure it was loaded with the safety on, then stuffed it in the back of his trouser waistband. Grabbing up his suit jacket and blind with fury, he plucked up his keys, entered the garage, and slid into a very fast car. Swearing to kill them all he drove toward Storybrooke like a demented bat out of Hell.

 

*****************************

Belle woke in a strange bed. Disoriented at first, the day before came back to her. She hung her head for a moment, trying to collect herself. She just couldn't believe that her life had fallen apart so fast. After crying a few useless tears, she got up to make herself ready to face a day full of unknowns and uncertainty. At last, feeling as ready as she would ever be, she went to open the bedroom door. For a split second she expected it to be locked, but of course it wasn't.

Belle made her way down the elegant curving staircase to the first floor. Having been too exhausted the night before to look around, she now took a little time to appreciate the decor of Gold's lovely house. In stark contrast to R's beautiful but cold modern decor, this house was full of warm dark wood and well loved antiques. A rainbow of gentle light came through the stained glass at the front door. The place felt like a home, as opposed to a perfect showplace. Belle felt comforted by its embracing coziness.

From the nearby kitchen Belle heard the clanging of pots and pans, and she entered the room to see Gold, shirtsleeves rolled up,busy whisking eggs in a mixing bowl. He was in his stocking feet, (a pair of purple socks, she noticed with a silent laugh) and his usually neat hair was mussed, a dab of flour on his face. Belle thought he looked adorable. "Good morning, you look busy. Can I help?"

Gold jumped a bit. He wasn't used to company. "Oh, no dear, I've got everything covered, the biscuits are in the oven, and eggs will be ready soon." He added a bit of pepper and spices to the egg mixture without measuring. "Theres coffee, juice, and tea on the table. Take your pick." He smiled warmly at her, his eyes crinkling at the corners with true pleasure. 

"You shouldn't go to such trouble," protested Belle, although she was secretly pleased by the domestic scene.

"Nonsense," said Gold firmly, "lucky for you, cooking is something I really enjoy, so just relax and reap the benefits of my culinary expertise." He grinned crookedly at her, and Belle couldn't help laughing.

Belle helped herself to a cup of tea, and sat down to watch Gold cook. He certainly seemed to know his way around a kitchen. She couldn't help glancing at his ass as he bent over to take the biscuits out of the oven; it was definitely worth looking at. She forced herself to look away and stare at her tea cup instead. 

Gold made her a plate of eggs and biscuits and with the help of his cane limped over to the table and set it in front of her. "Thank you," smiled Belle, "it looks delicious." She wondered what had caused his limp, but didn't want to be rude and ask, so she tucked into her meal.

Gold placed his own plate down, and after fetching some strawberry jam, joined her at the table.

"I was wondering," said Gold shyly, "if perhaps you would like me to show you around our little town today?" He looked at her hopefully and Belle felt her heart flutter. He was really so sweet.

"Don't you have to open your shop?"

"No, I can close for a day, hardly anyone comes in anyway, I'm not the most liked man in town." He looked down at the table.

Belle didn't know what to say, she longed to go over and hold him and stroke his soft hair, but of course she couldn't do that, he'd think she was crazy. She said instead,"I think there's a lot about you to like." She was delighted when Gold blushed and gave another shy smile. "And I would love to see the sights with you today." "Then, my dear, that is exactly what we shall do," Gold replied, pleased. They ate their meal in companionable silence, Belle refusing to depress herself by worrying about her situation right then. For now she wanted to enjoy this day with this kind and caring man, everything else could wait. R had no way of finding her, she was safe. 

After they finished eating, Gold stood and began gathering up the dishes to wash. "You are going to let me help to wash these," declared Belle in a tone which did not allow for argument. "I'm quite good at washing dishes." She winked.

"Are you now?" Teased Gold, "I never would have thought." Together they carried the dishes over to the large farmhouse style sink, where Gold began filling it with hot water and dish soap. As they plunged their hands into the suds and got to work, Belle occasionally "accidentally" brushed her hand up against his. She noticed that his face was looking a little pink, which made her want to tease hm more. As they came to an end of the chore she lifted a wet finger and touched his cheek. 

"You have a little flour there."

They were standing so close, face to face, and for a brief moment he simply looked into her eyes, mesmerized. She gazed back into his big brown eyes, so compassionate and kind. Suddenly he leapt back, "Please excuse me, I have something to take care of in my office before we go." He rushed out of the room as fast as he could with his limp.

"Well," thought Belle, bemused, "the poor man is somewhat lacking in social skills, very odd."

Gold entered his office and shut the door, leaning against it. "What the hell is wrong with me?" He asked himself as he adjusted himself through the front of his suddenly too tight pants. For Gods sake, get it together, you're not a fucking teenager! The way Belle's soft hand touched his, the way her eyes looked as they stared at one another, her fingertips caressing his unworthy face...Not helping! Desperate to distract himself, he pulled a ledger out of his desk and checked his rent accounts to see who was paid up and who was behind. After reading a list of boring numbers for awhile he thought he had himself back in control enough to rejoin his guest. He felt contempt for himself for having this reaction to a woman who was only looking for help.

**************************

R calmed down a little as he drove too fast. Of course he remembered that he wanted to do the right thing, and he fought to get his predatory instincts under control. He tried to hold on to what he had recently realized about his own nature, but it was so difficult. There may be no chance for him, but he had to admit, he truly did want Belle to have her chance. He just knew, though, that this son of a bitch from some podunk town was trying to take advantage of her, she was so naive. Once he had dispatched with this asshole he would set her free, end his own miserable life as he had planned. For just a painful second, he thought of Isobel, the only other human who had ever loved his sorry ass. It was too painful, and he bit his thumb until it bled to kill that impossible memory. R reached over and opened the sleek glovebox,he always kept a full flask in each car, just in case. As he took a huge swig of whisky he admitted to himself that maybe he had more than one problem. But what the fuck did it matter? All his problems were about to come to an end.

Finally, he felt a second of peace, perhaps, if he was lucky enough he would see Isobel in Purgatory before he was sentenced to Hell.

R drove in silence, confused, lonely, heartbroken. He knew he never had a chance to find love again, circumstances had warped him, body and soul, into a being no one could ever love. Nevertheless, he still craved love, was a creature of love, and so his very existence had become unbearable to himself. Hateful to the world, hateful to himself, always longing for love, unable to accept it. No one would ever look at him without revulsion, though his form was pleasing, they always saw what he was eventually. He wanted to claw out his own mind.

Without Isobel, no one could save him now...Just one more time to say his apologies, he couldn't clear his consience, but he would say sorry. R knew that one way or another, this was pretty much the end. Well, it's not like anyone would miss his sorry old ass. As a last deed he could at least save Belle from this fuckall who was trying to take advantage of a woman in pain. He grinned as he contemplated his one last act of murder. That much, at least, he could do right. 

*************************** 

Somewhat calmed, Gold exited his office and rejoined Belle in the kitchen. "Hey." He said stupidly. "Hey," she replied with a smile. Belle felt that his awkward charm was really growing on her. Gold shook his head, getting his silver hair out of his face. (And showing off those glorious cheekbones, Belle thought unwillingly), "Are you now prepared to view the dubious charms of our little town?" he asked with a raised eyebrow. "Yes, sir, I definitely am." Belle smiled, this was just what she needed to get her mind off the decidedly miserable mess her life had somehow become.

As they headed out the stain glass decorated front door, Bell reached out to take Golds arm, and startled, he jumped a little. He clearly wasn't used to anyone touching him, and Belle wondered sadly just how long he'd been alone. Looking at her with his soft honey gaze, the man gave her a tender smile, and Belle smiled back.

"You remember the park you visited last time?" Gold asked her. "There's s lovely little deli near there where we can put in an order for a picnic lunch. Perhaps you would like to visit some of the little boutiques and shops along that way as well."

"That sounds lovely." Belle smiled up at him and it took his breath away. Gold reminded himself that this woman was married, married to a man who, unlike him, was attractive and probably young. He grabbed his cane and let her take his arm in some wonder as they began their promenade.

Belle stole side glances at her companion as they walked. The sunlight brought out silver and walnut highlights in his soft looking hair, and she was close enough to feel his body heat and smell his cinnamon autumn scent. He smelled different from her husband, almost warmer somehow, with a secret underlayer of woodsmoke and nutmeg. His eyes, when he looked at her ,were shot through with golden highlights in their burnt honey depths, and were without artifice, calculation. Without noticing she moved closer to him on the sidewalk, syncing up their steps in companionable stroll that was effortless and without tension. Belle felt as if five years of a dark weight had dropped away.

Gold indulged her as she checked out shops. They wandered through one called Aladdins Carpets that had all manner of oriental carpets, exotic and gorgeous. Belle figured this was where Gold purchased the carpets in his own house. The store had an odd but pleasant smell redolent with incense and foreign spices.

After that Gold led Bell into a beautiful store called Ariels Grotto. It was lined with bubbling aquariums containing an amazing array of aquatic life. Belle exclaimed over the little waterfall and touch tank in the stores' corner, and picked up and examined the strange creatures.Gold watched the happiness on her face and it brought happiness to him. It had been too long since someone had simply enjoyed his company, he felt slightly dazed with it. They passed by a mattress store known as Sleepy Hollow, and purchased some sweets from packed little store named The Gingerbread House. Belle was thrilled with the charm of all of it.

After an enjoyable look through the small and quaint shops of the village, Belle and Gold headed over to the deli to pick up thier lunch. Belle exclaimed in absolute delight at the tiny shop that was modeled to look like a Swiss chalet, complete with intricate gingerbread and a clockwork bird that popped out of a magical looking little turret on the top. 

"Yes, its cute, isn't it" Gold remarked dryly, "A regular Gepetto's workshop." While Gold may not have been impressed with the architecture, Belle thought is was adorable. She gasped when they went inside to see every vertical surface hung with varied sizes and shapes of cuckoo clocks. Belle was entranced by watching the different tiny birds and animals that would, seemingly randomly, pop out.

The store had a mouthwatering smell of aged cheeses, and fresh baked Bread. After Belle was done exclaiming over the marvelously clever clocks, the two of them spent some time choosing fresh meats, crusty bread, and hard cheeses Gold had the frizzy haired little proprietor package it up for them. Happier than he could remember being, well, ever, Gold bravely took Belles elbow and steered her toward the park. He thought this was shaping up to be the best day of his life.

***************************

Some time later, as they were cleaning up the picnic detritus, Gold grinned at Belle. I have one more stop I believe you will enjoy."

"Oh," she slanted her eyes at him flirtatiously. "What would that be?"

His heart hammered, was she flirting with him. Ridiculous, of course not."Our little library of course. We'll pick up some books to read by the fire tonight."

Close together still, they walked through the park back toward Main Street and the library. Belle sighed in deep satisfaction. She wished she had met Gold years ago, how different those years might have been. Gold seemed quiet but glancing at him she saw a tiny smile playing about his lips. Belle apologized," I'm sorry, really, for barging into your life like this and taking up your time."

He looked at her, very serious, "Belle, no, please, you mustn't be sorry. I've had a wonderful time today and I enjoy your company more than you could know." He looked down at his feet, "it has meant so much to me."

Touched, Belle looped her arm through his once more, causing his tiny smile to bloom large. "It's meant a lot to me too. Oh look!" She gasped.

Gold was startled, fearing some catastrophe, but she was merely pointing to another shop, this one advertising itself as Its A Small World. The windows were filled with fancy dress dolls, such as pampered little girls might own.

"Can we please go in?" Belle turned huge pleading azure eyes to him. Of course he said yes.

Inside the store Belle oohed and aahed over the dolls. Of course she had never had one as a child, and she was surprised by the strange wistful longing she felt to own one still. A small way to capture a bit of the normal childhood she'd never had. She held one in her hand and smoothed its ruffled dress. Of course she had no money, and it was a silly wish anyway. Still her heart hurt when she put the frilly thing back on the shelf. She felt a painful nostalgia for a family life unlived, a child unloved.

Gold, who was of course watching Belle closely, saw the dejected slump of her shoulders. He would not have her in pain of any sort, and he thought he understood the particular sorrow afflicting her now. His childhood had been lonely too. Gold strode over to the shelf and claimed the doll. In front of her astonished eyes, he took it straight to the register and purchased it. Coming back to Belle, he handed it to her hopefully. "Will you have it?"

Belle felt tears spring to her eyes as she took the doll from him. Out of all the expensive gifts she'd received in the last years, this simple toy with its small ability to remember an innocent time, a reminder of what might have been, was the most precious thing she had ever received. Speechless with emotion, Bell stood on tiptoe and placed a delicate kiss on Gold's cheek.

The hapless man turned bright red, shuffled around a bit, and managed to splutter, "Well, it's just a doll."

But they both knew it wasn't.

***********************

R fumbled his cell phone out and hit speed dial.

"Where are they now Dove? How late is it open? She's likely to stay there a while, Ill catch them there." His voice was flat, the rage having been replaced by a heavy resignation. Just this last errand to wrap up and this miserable journey he had called an existence could end. Throwing the phone in the floor, he pulled out his flask and drank, driving to his destiny as the sun lowered for his last time.

***************************

In the tiny library Belle and Gold stood, suppodely looking for books, but really looking at each other. Belle was overcome with gratitude for this strange lonely man who had taken her in and seemed to understand her so well. Looking into his hopeful frightened eyes, she gently took one of his hands and held it carefully in her own. She rubbed her thumb in slow circles over the soft skin between his thumb and first finger, and felt him shiver at that tiniest of touches. 

Gold looked into Belles eyes as she leaned towards him, touching his hand in that intimate way. He didn't see any revulsion in her eyes, they looked clear and pure. He felt such longing, he didn't know what do do with it. It was frightening and thrilling at the same time. Gold slowly leaned toward Belle as she drew closer to him. Before he had a chance to wonder what it meant, the heavy library door flew open with a bang.

For a split second there was no sound.

Then a loudly gasped, "Isobel!" From Belle's husband, who looked wild.

But strangely, he wasn't looking at Belle, or even the man who looked just like him. 

Instead he was staring in slack jawed awe at the tiny dark haired librarian and the small brown eyed boy whose shoes she was tying.


	22. So Close

R staggered in the doorway of the library, his vision dimming somewhat. His mind stuttered, sputtered, couldn't quite get on track. It hurt, his heart also sputtered and stuttered, and that hurt, too. He broke out in a cold sweat. He felt his knees buckling, he was sure he was dying, hallucinating, every evil thing he had ever done coming home to roost like despicable huge eyed owls, there to trick, taunt him, before dragging him to death and hell where he belonged.

He couldn't stand, sank to the floor.

His eyes spilled over with confused, unbelieving tears.

He hid his eyes in his hands, couldn't look. Couldn't bear to see the vision wasn't real. His hands, trying to hide him from this shock, shook uncontrollably. His entire body shook. He moaned and swayed. He was pitiable, pitiful, broken, so so broken. 

Belle and Gold didn't know what to do at this awful sight, and Belle's generous nature compelled her forward. She wanted to help him still, she thought she had loved him, once. At the same time Gold, of course, though the memories were ancient, realized who he was. He needed this- his long lost twin! This man was once the boy who had saved him, his hero! At last! 

Both moving toward R, Belle and Gold stopped in their tracks when they observed the tiny graceful librarian make her way to help him. They felt compelled to halt their forward progress, as if they were frozen in time, watching a particular piece of important history play out. A moment in time meant to be, an inevitable pulse of the cosmos. They seemed to watch it through a gelid shield, slow, plodding, momentous.

The tiny librarian reached the prone distressed man,"Oh my, are you ok? Let me help you! You poor thing!" 

Gold looked up and moaned, closing his eyes again, tightly, afraid, so afraid this wasn't real. "Isobel." 

"Do you need me to call someone? Is her name Isobel?" 

"You, my love, my only love...." 

The tiny librarian knew he must be in trauma, but yet something... something... in some damaged part of her brain, it tugged. It almost remembered.... 

Gold and Belle came over and began to pick up R. 

"We'll take care of him," said Belle. She didn't understand why she had remained immobilized so long, R needed help! She may not be with him any longer, but that didn't mean she would abandon him like trash on the floor when he needed help! 

Gold wanted nothing more at this moment than to help the twin who had saved him. How on earth they had been brought back together, he didn't know. He knew one thing, as he picked up his unconscious brother and carried hm to the car, he was going to make it up to him now.

Between the two of them, Gold and Belle got R situated in the backseat, under the worried, watchful gaze of the diminutive librarian. Belle's intuition told her there was something there that even the librarian herself was unaware of, something almost planet moving, the power of a black hole, but an opposing powers, creative rather than destructive. It was eerie, delicate, like universes being born are delicate. So powerful, but just one molecule out of place... 

Belle shook her head. What fantasies were overtaking her!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you are reading this and haven't left kudos, please do so. I am wondering if I should just leave off. Should I continue?


	23. Rebirth

"I don't know what to think!" Belle moaned. "Has he completely lost his mind? Why did he call that woman Isobel?"

Gold stroked her back, trying to calm her."I don't know, I suspect we will have to wait for him to come to and ask him. " He continued to soothe her, but his heart was racing. His brother! But at the same time, his long lost brother was the man this woman was so afraid of. His stomach twisted with his conflicting emotions. He was determined to protect Belle no matter what. He hadn't known this woman long, but he felt an overwhelming need to comfort and protect her, and he knew he would do just that no matter what else was involved. His long fingers combed through her hair, and he murmured comforting nonsense against her neck. Suddenly he realized he had his face buried in her hair and he pulled away hastily, face reddening.

"Let me get you a glass of whisky to calm you nerves." He stood up in a hurry and went to the bar cart. Pouring an inch into a crystal tumbler he handed it to Belle while trying to conceal the trembling of his hand.

"Belle," Gold spoke gently,"Why didnt you tell me? I can't believe it, after all this time, my brother!" He looked amazed and confused. He didn't know where to begin, he had so many questions for his twin. 

"I don't really know," Belle sniffled, "I was afraid, and I had a feeling something awful would happen. I'm so sorry, I should have said something, it's just... things have been so very difficult." Belle continued weeping. 

Gold tightened his hold around her. "I understand, my dear. You've been through a traumatic experience, and no one knows more than I how that can affect a person. Although'" his eyes shone with unshed tears, "perhaps my brother knows it even more than I."

Gold held Belle tightly, they both needed the contact. He buried his sharp nose in her chestnut hair and inhaled deeply, the scent of honeysuckle helping to balance him. Everything that was happening was so overwhelming. He calmed himself by combing his fingers through her long silky hair, his heart and brain a knot of unsolvable emotions. His shattered world spun around him, trying to piece itself back together, and he sensed that somehow this tiny, beautiful woman in his arms was the key. He surrounded her with his arms and held on for dear life.


End file.
